They are terrible, miserable people. Stupid, selfish, entitled, boring people. That’s the worst part to me. They try so hard to be interesting and yet they bore me to tears because nothing they do is genuine. And if it is, it’s genuinely awful.

Kardashians are terrible. News at 11.

I have to wonder what the F his appeal is anymore. It can’t be that scuzzy gutter look he’s championing right now. It can’t be his dormant career or his history of abuse. It can’t be his illegitimate child or the mother of that child who will most likely always be around competing with you, either.

Yeah, she’s clinging onto youth in a very unnerving way. It just looks uncomfortable trying to maintain that facade when your own life is taking you farther and farther from it every day.

Trying a different tactic on this post, yeah? Given your recent comments about the Duggars, I would’ve thought you’d shame them for their codependency.

lol. k.

She may as well have named him, “Screw you kid you’re the product of a life I was pressured into but never wanted and because of that I’m naming you Spurgeon” Dillard.

“Um,” no. You’re that special breed of commenter where people can’t tell if you’re serious or just dim.

Some people are just asking for it. And in those cases, it’s okay to laugh. And laugh. And laugh again.

Related: it boggles the mind you can have a kid without the same rule. Maybe if you had to get a mandatory education before spawning, shit like this wouldn’t happen. Because apparently some people need to be told: guns + kids = NO, BITCH.

This is Darwinism. This is actually Darwinism playing out in front of us. The actual Darwin would be excited for being so correct or embarrassed for being so correct.

I’m not. Darwinism.

Yeah, I get that. I suppose if it were my field and I oversaw a zillion scenarios like that each week, I’d be hard-nosed and practical about it too. With the puppies I chip, I know the needle is big and painful, but I also know the chip it delivers is going to serve them for the rest of their lives so the pain takes a…

I would love to set up a family of big cats in a mock living room rife with glass coffee tables, vases, drinking classes filled with wine, and various tchotchkes. For science.

I would think they could put the kid under for that. Or at least put some topical anesthesia on the area. Now, since I’m home at 2 pm on a Wednesday eating cookie dough for breakfast, it’s obvious I’m not a doctor and I don’t know if this is a horrible idea because of possible interactions, etc. But it’d seem in…

This sounds like the Master Cleanse diet that was all the rage a few years ago. No wonder that kid died. It wasn’t the meningitis, it was the batshit diet that could kill a healthy Beyonce if it wanted to.

I KNOW. Women-as-objects in its most puerile, revolting form. Dad is all, “Yeah, she’s all things wonderful things, but she’s also A VIRGIN and we all know that’s what really matters, fellas.” Just the thought of a father being so focused on his daughter’s hymen is perverse and pathetic.

For someone averse to dates, it seems like you’ve been on a lot of shitty ones :)

When I was in preschool I didn’t even know how to undo the clasps on my overalls or prevent my skirt from getting tucked in my tights after I used the bathroom. This woman probably doesn’t know how to do those things, either.

They’ll conclude she probably had it coming. She was a girl. What in the hell was she thinking rejecting the advances of a guy? Death sentence!