I'm not one to leap to Kim's defense, but I have not had any cosmetic procedures, yet my ass has been growing steadily for the past few years as well. It's all about the fat injections. Which I take orally, in the form of nice French cheeses. That way it doesn't show on the x rays. :)

I have bird stamps and circus stamps. If I don't like you then you get a clown stamp. If you piss me off, you get the bird.

Stamps are awesome!

and then a hero comes along

My parents have two male ducks. They get to run around outside of their (very spacious) pen every afternoon/evening. When my mom decides it's time for them to go back into their pen, all she has to do is whistle "When Johnny Comes Marching Home Again" and they go right into the pen and wait for the gate to be shut.

In soviet Russia, orangutan fingerbangs you.

I start too many FB posts with "apparently". Everyone sent this kid's video to me and said "Hey! Apparently your kid is famous." Assholes. All of my friends are apparently assholes.

Ouch. That literally burned.

finally, somebody wrote something newsworthy here

Very true. Polish Catholics were not spared.

It is a lobsterpio.

I wouldn't call mine a disaster, but the artist did slip a little bit, making one of the words in my tattoo pretty much unreadable.

I'm invading Poland later today right after my period stops.

i agree, hate HATE the watch .

This was my pregnant portrait.

And a partridge. In a pear tree.

I'm not cute. I'm fucking drop dead gorgeous.

Colon Pink Hole.

I had a crazy stalker. And you better motherfucking believe I own a shotgun now. I'm smart about it and I don't apologize for it. I'd rather the potential that something "go wrong" while I'm defending myself than while I'm defenseless.

That little pig is kinda cute.