This needs to win. It's so many love stories all blended into one.

Ahhh, czarnina, aka duck's blood soup! My mom used to make it. She even bled the duck herself once to ensure it was fresh and clot free.

I attended an all-girls high school and news stories like this make me so damned happy I did. I took four years each of maths and sciences, acing them all, including AP calculus.

Alice Cooper spoon fed me ice cream. It was magical.

I just turned 50 and sport the longest hair I've ever had in my life. My Mom, who just turned 82, loves my hair and thinks I should wear it long until I'm dead. She's even grown hers out a little just because she sees it as attractive. Granted, she has the most spectacular silver and white hair so I think she likes to…

An older academic sort who casually informed me during post-sex small talk that he CHEWED HIS TOENAILS.

Small dogs are incensed about butt sniffing. Major chip carrying on the proverbial shoulder.

In the immortal words of my niece, " if you're going to have a stuffed bear, I'm going to punish it!" (Artistic license taken. Niece was talking about a flip top garbage can and why she and her younger brother were incessantly banging on it.)

My god, those are adorable babies. Like puppies!

Up until my current relationship, I struggled with every aspect of sex frequency, permission and who should achieve what out of each encounter. I took a seven year break from relationships for many reasons, and finally came to understand what sex meant to me. It led to very liberating and satisfying pursuits, and when…

HWMP?*

so like any holiday dinner with my family.....

Mark, keep doing you. Rodent lovers unite!

Avocados are the eggs of bald eagles, hence no replacement necessary.

Bumble needs to paint her poodle's nails in bumble blue.

This picture needs the goat screaming sound accompanying it.

I wish I could give your comment a million likes. Billy Buck has been waiting his whole life for a video like this.

I was a tomboy in the 1970s, tagging along and playing all sorts of pickup games with my older brother and his friends: fast-pitch, 16" softball (Chicago shout out), football, floor hockey, whatever they had going. I WISH I had Mo'Ne to look up to back then. Those boys would have gotten an even better whomping if I…

I think this is the first and only time where a trifle of Babycakes might be the secret task force that will hunt down his attackers then bring their limp dead bodies as offering of their loyalty.

Dammit, there's a SLOW acronym for their union but I'm one glass of wine too far to come up with it. Help please!