I'm confused about her statement that she doesn't feel like her mom isn't "[her] mom no more" because she has to follow all these rules to stay in her house." Did there used to be no rules?

@carinamarie: I'm actually a star. In the sky. My next project is the Big Dipper. Paul Feig directs Judd Aptow to act out scenes from my life, which became the inspiration for My So-Called Life. I turned water into wine and then into coffee I have so much faith. I'm also a telephone, so I can call myself, so...

Well, I was, ummm, the next breakout star. Twice. And all my next projects have titles. Paul Feig directed my wedding. Judd Apatow writes me grocery list. I have faith in every team, probably more than you do. I already banished all the specters everywhere. There's no more ghosts. You can send an email to me…

That seems like a pretty intense reaction for a country where everyone smokes all the time. I mean, it would be like Norway fining networks for having too many blond actors on a show.

@kellieherson: Me and everyone else with an internet connection.

@OverratedUnderwhelmed: Yes, but you'll have to share with the other winners, which is approximately everyone, ever.

Uh, I think Tila's just begun tweeting her miscarriage. Sheer class, that one.

I love slot machines. I don't particularly love to gamble, but I'm endlessly amused by the seemingly inexplicable scoring. Like, "candle, candle, wolf, broomstick, elephant" wins, but "candle candle, wolf, broomstick, baseball" is no good. Like, oh, OBVIOUSLY "baseball" is no good! That makes perfect sense!

I'd probably have a few choice words for the delicate princess who didn't like the word "diet" and wanted me to call it a "lifestyle" instead, as if that made it any less of a dietary change. Then again, I'm not a doctor and under no obligation to behave in a professional manner.

Isla Fisher's pregnant again by Zombie DJ AM? Whoa. I've got to catch up on my celebrity gossip, clearly.

@msmoneypenny: Seriously, does he make her garden or something? How do her nails get dirty?

Someone once pointed out how you hear stories about a family moves across the country and the dog gets separated but manages to follow them thousands of miles. And then some families move across the country and the cat escapes, and the neighbors find the cat back at the old house months later.

Oh, Topher Grace, I almost did that. Christmas Eve, 1996. I was at a friend's house and my mom was on her way to pick me up for Midnight Mass. I had just smoked a cigarette and wanted to hide the smell so I grabbed the Altoid tin my bff brought and went to pop a few in my mouth.

My friend has a dog with crazy allergies who can only be fed rice and venison because she's allergic to all other meats and starches. She has boots because she's allergic to grass and her feet will swell. She's allergic to pollen and needs all sorts of drugs and steroids and still she scratches until she's bloody. …

Maybe I imagined it, but I feel like when Zac Posen was starting out he was all about curvy "real" bodies, and made these really beautiful dresses that flattered hips and butts and boobs. And then a couple of years ago he started to really get into the skinny-skinny models and clothes for skinny-skinny women. Why…

@CatGaffney: Ha!

A good orgasm definitely leaves me stupid for a few minutes after. Like, I can't complete a sentence or make any complex movements, so I agree with "Confused", though your "Befuddlement" is probably more accurate.

@LittleDogLaughed: That's a really good point. I'd never thought of that connection before.

Wow, that black stuff would be all over my face in under 30 seconds. I'm equally impressed with her clean face as I am with her athletic ability.

@heykoukla: Very good point.