@NellMood: I read somewhere that Kansas RAISED their age limit to 14 a few years ago. Raised. Fucking crazy.

I read the article about the world's oldest person who died yesterday at 115, and it said she lived on a steady diet of bacon, fired chicken and ice cream, and this woman smokes for nearly a century- so maybe the secret to long life is just enjoying the fuck out life?

@LuvEwan: There's always hope.

@ihateyourescalade: Seriously, that is just jibberish. She could have just twittered "turkey runaround &&&&&& gem is outragis truly truyl HAPPY LABOR DAY^" for all the sense that all makes.

@chi-girl: It just sounds like how you signal an animal. It's gross.

Man, that is a rough picture of LL there. That poor girl.

More than actual lewd words, I HATE the guys that make that weird half-click, half-pssst noise at me. WTF even is that?

I don't get this plot twist. Carrie and Charlotte go back to the 80's but Miranda goes to 2040? And then back to the 80's but in another dimension where she was a teenage boy? And then they all meet in a time paradox?! My brain hurts.

@Penny: Yeah, I really like it. And as celeb baby names go, that is not so outlandish.

It's an Amish technique. It's like slapping someone with silence. I was shunned from the age four until my sixth birthday for not saving the excess oil from a can of tuna.

@keldo: I love it. If it wasn't so high in sodium I would probably drink it every day.

@Gobiasomecoffee: I LOVE Upstairs Downstairs. That was a great show. I got them all on Netflix a year or two ago and binged on it for a month.

@cleverpeach: Someone once told me you can break it up by "combing" it with one of those cheap black plastic combs. I can report that it significantly lessened the duration of the hickey, though it didn't take it away instantly.

@DuckDuckGoose: That's what I'm talking about!

@boxspelunker: A friend of mine got something like this once. I forget what it was called, and I don't think there actually was any treatment for it, but basically it was just a weird rash that went away on it's own. But I remember her saying that she got small white bumps like the day after she slept with this guy.

I bet Patrick Stewart would come up with a really outstanding men's cologne.

Not that it's any excuse, but I feel like all I've read about her town that she has written has been really nasty, like the men are ugly hillbillies and everyone is stupid, unlike her glamorous city self. It was only a matter of time before someone registered a complaint, country-style.

@CurtCole: On one hand, I'm very grateful that my parents didn't assign chores based on "girls cook, boys do yardwork" because now I know how to fully care for a house (and its inhabitants) on my own, but on the other hand, there were more than a few times I was outside in howling snow shoveling out the driveway…

@morninggloria: You can't beat the Redfeathers.

@yearofthewoman: I feel like some female comics try to be as totally vulgar as they possibly can be for shock value, like, "Can you believe it?! I'm a girl, talking about how gross period poop is! AHAHA I'M SOOOO EDGY." But no, just like male comics who think that grossing people out is the height of humor, it's…