I won't comment on this comment given my psyche if all of a sudden words grammar words, lack of punctuation, and coherent thoughts. I don't think you should either.

Golf claps all around everyone!

Will that restore your faith in humanity?

What if I do pepperoni and sausage?

I find that "fork" sounds weird after a few goes. Fork fork fork.

I see your point. But you've at least tried the stuff and decided it sucked. I still, at almost 30, know people who won't eat just because. Those people are bitches. At the same time though, fuck people who can't appreciate a good, messy pepperoni pizza because it's not artisan or whatever the fuck.

She went for the passenger side because the Vanna White opened the passenger side for her. There's nothing interesting about that. I'm sure if the driver side door was opened she would have gotten in on that side. I'd jump in the trunk if I won and they opened it for me.

Do you think he went out to get a whamburger and some french cries for lunch after this?

It's not ironic. It's straight hypocritical. There have been multiple stories on this site essentially calling guys scumbags when they post about their sexual exploits with women. The ones they really hate are the ones where the guy was an asshole and manipulative to get the woman in bed. Meanwhile, this is laughed…

Do you comment over at deadspin? This is an unusually awesome comment for this site. Well done.

Well I thought you had taken all of the puns, but I'm damn good at this game.

If this guy keeps his eye on the horizon and stays true to the course, it should be smooth sailing from here on out.

It's clear that his life will be a bit turbulent, what with possible legal ramifications for this action.

It's very good, as are most things he writes. It's a slightly different style as he doesn't get as silly as he does on here. But it's still most definitely Magary. It's worth the time to read it.

These are humans. Not dogs. I think I'd kill my parents if my name was fucking Peppa.

B. Every time. Even if you know it's not getting sucked up. You try dammit!

No one is getting on the peanut butter and american cheese bus.

I feel your pain.

This is the best night of my life!

The real problem is that they were wings from McDonalds. Now I'm certainly no food snob, but you'd have to do something really nice for me to convince me that eating wings from McD's is a good idea.

Mine is Buddy, Buddy, Buddy. Buuuudy! To the tune of money money money money.