Talk about burying the lede: Joe Montana goes by “Joseph” on Twitter? lol

It was so obvious that Montana’s sons weren’t real football players.

Maybe they should look to the minor leagues.  I go to a bunch of Buffalo Bisons games, and they are very entertaining.  They’ve got a kid coming back, hellua hitter, really fun to watch.  Maybe the MLB could get some guys like him.

Average NFL game length: 3 hours, 12 minutes

So it was a hat trick, you’re sayin’?

Sure the Texas Stars’ defenseman shot the puck. But for that puck to go in I bet there was a second shooter.

This is a fair point and the article has been amended in the interests of the ethics.

Why is it surprising that the Trojans would admit people who shouldn’t have gotten in?

Hercules Capital

You think the cheating stopped once they got in? How are your friends Santa Claus, Tooth Fairy, and Eater Bunny doing?

Breshad Perriman: I’m going to give it my all in Tampa and catch everything that comes my way.

I’m surprised at how little mention there is in these comments about affirmative action, about the ‘reverse discrimination’ hoax, how the coddled children of the rich play basketball and party on the weekends and have summer beach weeks with Squee, when working class kids are working at a fast food joint evenings and…

*fresh faced with a pound of foundation, my bad.

It’s really not funny. I’m thinking of all of the really hard working students, students who put in the time, got great grades, and whose parents don’t have hundreds of thousands to bribe their way in.

I don’t care who’s in it, but fucking Aaron Sorkin should be writing it.  Too bad Huffman’s implicated, because William H Macy could channel his best Jerry Lundegaard to play one of the perps as the net starts to close.

What unwitting kids? Many of them actively posed with their water polo gear or rowing machines. And even if the parents helped change their board scores or photoshopped their headshots into athletes behind their backs, the kids should’ve known something was afoot when they got into a school after failing Art History…

Nah. They’ll cast Candice Cameron Bure just to piss her off.

I don’t feel bad for the kids at all. They had every possible advantage in life (including parents who were filling to commit crimes on their behalf) and they still couldn’t get accepted to decent colleges? Cry me a river.

Fuck you, fuck your milkman, fuck evening TV and take your star.

I like to imagine that Olivia Jade got accepted at MIT and U Chicago, but attending either of those schools would have hurt her budding lifestyle brand, so they cheated to get her into USC.