Don't nuts in general just have hella fatty fatness in them? Wouldn't that kind of negate the health benefits?

No peanut butter? Fuck. Also- you greatly underestimate the depths of my depression if you think I don’t hold peanut butter in my hands. I don't have the energy to get a spoon, mmmk?

DICK PICS

Pics or it didn't happen

Fuck it. I’m making my own clothes.

Nigerian Prince jokes are about as funny as any other joke from 2011

Yeah but your cat names are cool.

Angelface and Diamond Baby?????

She ran away quickly (presumably to avoid being stabbed) before anyone could say anything back to her.

I love you.

Nobody cares about your stupid boner.

JUST WAIT UNTIL YOU GET OLD AND FAT, TABLE! THEN YOU’LL BE BEGGING ME TO SEXUALLY HARASS YOU.

I seriously laughed out loud at this.

I love her voice and the message in most of her songs, but my god, I just can’t get into country music. It’s just so cheesy. I realize that that’s kind of the point, but this song is hella thirsty.

I have locked my keys in the cars so. many. fucking. times. all because I had no where to put them so I threw them on the seat and forgot about them until it was too late. Every single time it could have been avoided if I had just had SOME FUCKING POCKETS TO STICK MY SHIT IN.

FUCK THE LACK OF REAL POCKETS IN WOMEN'S CLOTHES. FUCK IT SO HARD.

As a real actual hobo, I would just like to say that the bindle is wholly impractical for a hobo lifestyle. So jokes on you, wannabes.

Mad Max was really difficult for me to watch. Nicohlas Holt and Tom Hardy in one place? TOO MUCH SEXY. I would do Holt even in the Nux make up. Dont care.

How does he feel about Beyoncé?