Before the internet, I also never realized how many barely-legal-teenage nymphets were waiting for me to contact them, either.

@Sprzout: The Jesuits were also a strong force for intellectual progress, as well. Religious authority wasn't always so hostile to independent thought.

It's not that the electrons move faster, it's that they think they move faster when drunk.

@_MARVKO_: Even better, use Graham crackers to play Soggy Cookie with. Two-fer!

I would have loved to see the look on the first person looking at Penzias and Wilson's paper suggesting that their radio telescope static was proof of the Big Bang.

Foursquare will also debut the feature that shows desperately sexed-up guys. It will consist of a map of the world, with every continent* tinted cyan.

@#16 for the win: Short of your employer using a keylogger or screen capturing software, using web-based email is safe. Using a Flash drive is safer. Using a Flash-bootable OS with a browser, then using webbased email is even safer than that.

@DrTrent: That's what's totally über-screwed-up. All of the above is bad enough, but then being cut loose one day past Ship Date should be criminal.

@wild_world_girl: The only thing worse than unions are the companies so bad that their employees realize that they need to unionize.

@MazdaMania: OMG, I was half-jesting.

@MazdaMania: Whoa, that's filled with so much Wrong that it's hard to know where to start.

Any manager unable to properly balance out resources and timelines to prevent these kinds of over-allocations should be fired.

Have they passed the ultimate test: catapulting them into little piggies' houses who've stolen their chicks?

Err, stars technically don't float in vacuum, these hot burning giant orbs of flaming gas warp the very timespace around them, like the twinkly, shiny, badasses of the universes they are.

If only WoW had a Fluffy Kitteh class, because a face-off between 500 Orcs and them would have been epic.

Whoa. It's like looking at the spec sheets for which Pentium I beige box will run which version of Windows Vista.

So... You're saying that Swine Flu survivors were granted superpowers?

I'm sticking through it until the son becomes The Cape's smart-alecky, acrobatic sidekick, The Cravat.

Until scientists offer conclusive proof that the blackbirds died of blunt force trauma because their poor eyesight resulted in their crashing into each other while engaging in airborne sex, I choose to believe it was Love that killed the poor squawking bast*rds.

@Panayjon: You are seriously underestimating the appeal of your hallucinatory ghost movies. They give us shivers while making us think that we're experiencing Rave flashbacks, all at the same time.