Bruh you don’t just not go to an event where you get to watch something as prestigious as the 50km racewalk.

I grew up in Maine, where our State Bird is the mosquito, and spent a summer in Freetown, Sierra Leone, where the mosquitoes occasionally carried off small dogs and cats. Citronella candles? Useless. Stationary zappers? Useless. 90% DEET spray? Fuckers land right where I sprayed it just to mock me.

Handheld electric…

Hey! He was a TALL 12 year old, okay? And he was openly carrying what looked like a real gun which obviously indicates illegal activity and danger!

How did I miss this?!

One needs to recognize the influence that peer pressure and the attitude of having to fit in can have on someone.

I can’t tell if Kinja is just being Kinja and, as usual, not working properly, or Deadspin really grayed me again because they’re really sensitive about the fact I didn’t get their joke.

My mistake. the facebook thingy wouldn’t load, and without that there was literally nothing else in this article hinting that “All Takes Matter” was not the actual name of the show. The lead-in .gif, the titles of the linked articles at the bottom also all saying “All Takes Matter” and the fact this is about a FOX…

The .gif that says “All Takes Matter?” I did, that was the problem. The facebook live thing wouldn’t load, so there was literally no other indication in the article whatsoever that “All Takes Matter” was not, in fact, the name.

Really? The name is “All Takes Matter?”

Exactly. I spent $100 dollars on a fucking Welker jersey halfway through the 2011 season. 2012 Brady takes a paycut to keep him. 2013 he’s playing in Denver.

If I only bought jerseys of players I thought Belichick would pay/not heartlessly cut, I wouldn’t be able to buy any fucking jerseys. I was about to shell out…

It may validly “smack of paternalism” but let’s be honest, athletes, especially those in a major sport making a lot of money, have pretty consistently shown that when the decision is theirs they will choose to play until they absolutely cannot physically do so, and by then the damage is done. Even at the high school…

You’re joking right? Only a moron would think it was suggested that any tactic whatsoever would stop 100% of all rapes. No one has ever suggested that, including me. But if you don’t think that how we raise our children to treat women has THE BIGGEST NET EFFECT OF ALL ON HOW MUCH RAPE HAPPENS, you are a huge part of…

I’m not lying at all. I said it would help if we raised our sons not to rape women, and you said something along the lines of “do that in one hand and shit in the other and see which piles up first.”

Unless you didn’t know that saying is used to indicate an idea is worthless, in which case maybe don’t use it? There’s…

Yeah, but as you directly told me in the comments of another article, there’s no point to parents teaching sons not to rape! It’s almost as if this is a perfect example of what happens when parents do the opposite of that. Weird.

Where’s that Flying Squid guy who told me raising sons not to rape is a worthless endeavor? I’m guessing he would commend this father on obviously not wasting precious time on such an irrelevant part of parenting.

I am too young to have ever gotten to see Muhammad Ali fight, but there is no athlete I admire anywhere near as much. When I was four years old, he lit the torch at the very first Olympics I ever watched. In grade school, the first time we got to pick our own subject for a research project, I picked Muhammad Ali. Long…

Selfish: Patriots go 19-0

Charitable: Give Asafa Powell a fucking Gold Medal in the 100m. I don’t care which WC/OG final you pick, just fucking give that poor bastard something.

America’s Feel-Good Sports Moment of 2001 was the Patriots upsetting the Rams. It had everything. Underdogs winning to feed into our American love of underdogs despite being a massive superpower! A Captain-America-like tale of a scrawny backup becoming the hero! The fact they were LITERALLY called the Patriots during…

This is a dumb take. 03+04 pats were historically good. Losing in 01 would, at worst, make them back to back 12-4 seasons instead of 14-2 seasons, but probably not even that.

I’ve never heard of a red timeline before.