hanging upside down on the monkey bars from your legs only and then swinging and flinging your legs with such momentum that you flew off and landed on your feet. Aah, the good old days. 

both of my ankles would shatter on impact. I threw out my back sneezing a few years ago and now I have a “special” way so that it doesn’t happen again. Getting old is bullshit. 

basically you buy asparagus for the two free rubber bands. 

if you can scream-sing it at full volume, it serves its purpose and therefore is not a shitty song. See also; “More Than Words” by Xtreme or whatever the fuck the name of that shitty band is. 

If you skipped season 2 you missed Shogun World which was my favorite episode.

What does the sign say?

i saw so many people react in ANGER to the NY Times reportage of this study. I think that some people are so resistant to the “if you know better then you do better” type of personal growth. I also saw a woman say that she asks her child to do things politely and then has to yell at her child to get her to do things.…

you don’t have good context/reading comprehension skills, do you?

you all have some really low bars on what’s cute. This is how Blake Shelton was People’s hottest dude or whatever because above politician is Shelton-adjacent. 

what was it for?

i mean isn’t that longer than you have to ride a bucking bronco at a rodeo? YOU WIN A MEDAL

me too. I’m almost twice her age and have been listening to this on repeat all week. I kinda love the kid. 

do you just hate all that is good in the world? I mean how, sway?

you’re like a million types of dum. 

I just wake up. I never got a coffee habit. On the mornings I work, I tend to have  a cup of black tea about an hour after I wake up, but I don’t usually have any tea on the weekends unless I drank a lot/didn’t get much sleep the night before. Never developing a habit kind of prevents the need for the drug. 

i work from home and live alone, so I make sure to invite a friend over at least once a week so I don’t get too weird and I am forced to keep the house clean. I cook for my boyfriend but I also like to catch up with a friend over a tasty meal and wine. I also can cook a way more elaborate meal than I could afford to…

that sounds delicious! Was it real cheese or “cheese product?”

what in chemical hell is an eggless omelet? 

is he doing the dishes? Do you throw them out of the window when you cook or are they normal pots and pans that can be washed like normal? And what the fuck does he eat? He sounds insane. 

yeah this is the most basic, sitcom dad level of personal responsibility. Maybe if my gentleman caller did all of the chores for like a month without being prodded and I was in the most relaxed state of my life would I be like “ooh, I’m going to fuck you real good” but probably not, because it’s not like we have some…