My favorite call-in was my Dad’s. There was an NFLer that graduated from one of the big schools and it got out that he was illiterate (I don’t recall who it was, this must have been before James Brooks though, because I was definitely a kid.) Anyway, the whole show was about what a scandal it was and how it was…

Lee Hacksaw Hamilton! “From Baja to the Canadian Rockies!” “Leucadia, show me your lightning bolt!”

Goes to show just what a nightmare human Jones is if Goodell is coming off as the good guy here.

This quote:
“I would like to ask [Spacey] how it feels to lose a lifetime of success and hard work all because of 10 minutes of indiscretion 10 years or more ago.”

Reminds me of this quote:
“His life will never the one that he dreamed about and worked so hard to achieve. That is a steep price to pay for 20 minutes of…

My personal favorite, butt to each his own.

I’m so fucking sick of this shit. Not one person in the military has “fought for my freedom” so stop saying it. And as far as the sacrifices they made, it’s a dangerous job sure, most likely taken because of a lack of options. I don’t hate military people, but I don’t feel the need to thank them. For what exactly?…

you want to get to the bottom of this?

The one thing I will accept about pickle juice is picklebacks. Something about a shot of whiskey makes pickle juice not only acceptable, but pretty damn good.

Worse, Julie would only hold his hand on a contraction to contraction basis. She refused to commit to multiple contractions in a row.

I personally take offense at the fact that the “bad” part of the map’s name ends with ‘istan’ implying middle-eastern* = bad, wouldn’t it be more appropriate to name it something like “United State of Moronica” or somesuch?

Feet? I thought he only liked fucking the Calves

“Ewww, feet? Doesn’t he know where they’ve been?”

That’s why I skipped as many as possible. Just to be safe.

Come on Mike, can’t you act more like some of the guys from your ‘85 Super Bowl team. Dave Duerson, preferably.

And $25 by cutting her own bangs.

He should stick to evil and stop commenting on sports.

Yes: somebody has been hired to make sure a brothel is worthy of O.J. Simpson.

I wonder if he’s ever thought about having games like that in April, May, or June instead of October. Just to see what it’s like.

John Oliver can say the words I want to say better than I could ever dream: gun control needs to be a daily fight, I would say moreso on a state level at this point because Federal is apparently ignorable.

Sorry man. It is a very nice car. I was being an asshole.