its a sailboat!

Thank you for correctly quoting "Hack" as this isn't a hack. Slashdot didn't.

What do you know... It was also the password on his luggage & briefcase!

Did the "hackers" look something like this?

It's only a model.

my doctor told me not to. You'll go blind

wishing and hoping (and thinking and praying)

I should never have looked because now my blissful ignorance of everything being clean when it comes out of the dishwasher is broken! I always assumed there were little elves in there hand washing each item but no, the magic is gone.

While my dogs will eat nearly anything, including their own feces mere seconds after being expelled from their rear, they will not touch treats. Lucky them, I suppose?

Alternate title to this: "Probulator"

Wear some gloves.

Yes but Windows was still pretty much just a pretty shell on top of DOS at the time.

You do realize that "avoiding online gaming" is not the same thing as not gaming, right? I mean, even a cursory read of his post outs him as a gamer.

This is one of the creepiest photos in all the history of photography.

But then the inverse would be the truck coming in them. I bet there's fanfic of that. (Please don't look it up for me.)

Can't believe you overlooked Alan Dean Foster, best known for his Flinx series, and the (non-canon but nonetheless wonderful) Star Wars novel, Splinter of the Mind's Eye.

I was totally into this girl I went to high school with.

I went out with her a few times freshmen year, and then she dumped me. I'll get back to this.

She was smart, super cute, and had a great personality. We got along great.

Fast forward to many years later, I ran into her at a party. Where she confessed to me that…

Alan Dean Foster explained this one in the Novelization of Alien. The Xenomorph begins to torment Jones in his carrier while Ripley is hiding in the closet donning her space suit. Finally annoyed he can't get to the juicy, yowling, kitty center, the Xeno pounds the cat (who is now spitting and screaming steadily)…