Agreed. Except if it’s my mother, a very smart woman who sometimes doesn’t get jokes. Watching her while somebody explains to her why everyone laughed at the joke and slowly getting it before laughing is hilarious every time. It’s extra funny if she decides it wasn’t very funny after all.  

That’s the great logic here.

Oh, they have an ideology all right.

I always say when this nonsense comes up that we all call on experts all the time. Your kid breaks his leg, you go to a doctor. Somebody stiffs you in business, you call a lawyer. Your car breaks down, you go to a mechanic. We all think structural engineers should handle bridge building.

Seriously. I’ve never seen the show before, because I don’t have FS1, and because I heard Cowherd on the radio many years ago and have common sense. I couldn’t believe how he was perched up there. It looks like a SNL parody sketch or something.  

There are only three kinds of people who support Trump.

How else would people know that he won the election a couple of years ago, when nobody thought he could?  

I once, while waiting tables, dropped a basket of buffalo wings on a woman wearing a very nice, white sweater.  It made a really cool abstract design, but she didn’t really see the art in it.  

Awesome riffs. If you like stoner/desert rock on the slightly heavy side,this is for you.

Was it Ahmad Rashad’s wedding?

I could be wrong, but Beckham always struck me as, let’s just say, not very smart.  But it seems that he was aware of this fact and tried not to say too much.  

He is exactly A-Rod, just more talented. Great call.

In hockey, the ref can penalize a player for embellishing. Players who embellish repeatedly get fined.  This has to happen in soccer.

What is truly hot about Elastagirl is that Holly Hunter is the coolest and sexiest woman on earth. I fell in love with her when I saw Broadcast News, and her voice and general awesomeness are what make Elastagirl boner worthy.

Well, Florida is shaped like a dick.

No. You pour the chip crumbs into a clean bowl, then add the salsa so you can get a proper proportion of chips to salsa, then eat with a spoon.

I have one bottle of cologne.  My wife bought it for me in 2005 and it’s about three-quarters full.  I even like it!

Well, if it’s popping up on Twitter it must be true.  Hey, did you hear that the girl from Stranger Things hates gay people?

To be fair, his job is to screw over the players during CBA negotiations.  The union is at fault if they get screwed.  The NFL is the prime example of this.