Since he specifically said that there is “No Chance,” whenever he’s quoted by the media they’ll have to report that he said there’s ““No Chance”” he’ll play under the franchise tag.

This refers only to exclamation points and question marks, not all punctuation.

lol looks like six figures can’t buy you class

Pittsburgh is still looking really great in terms of Housing Affordability, but I have zero clue why Pittsburgh would rank so low in Quality of Life. Akron OH ranks about 30% points higher than Pittsburgh and I guarantee you that no one wants to live in Akron. It’s Akron.

This is a great song and video. I love Beck and Deadspin and murdering Tofu. These are so crucial to my personal brand.

YOU BREAK IT YOU PAYET

The Copa America is a 12-team competition held between teams from South America, with a special invitation extended to a small number of Central and/or North American teams. They just held a Copa America in 2015, but this year they are putting on a larger “special edition”(16-team) tournament to celebrate its 100-year…

This is essentially a Caravaggio painting

Love a wet Herrera

Is it mandatory to own calf-high black socks if you’re a teenager now?

Except that Spurs have shown an Aston Villa-esque amount of mental fortitude in their recent games.

Having a good Jordan Year is important too. Being 23 is a good time to be.

Hazard clinches the title at Stamford Bridge two years running

Is it just me or does it sound like the guitar is about to launch into an off-brand version of Free Fallin’?

Are you okay

It’s weird you think backing into the title is forcing the second place team into a must-win three games scenario.

If Spurs blow it in these next couple of games and Arsenal squeak ahead of them will it be the most bitterly devastating thing to ever happen in sports?

I clicked through looking for what these terse messages were but I didn’t find any. I’m just assuming they were “Oh shit” and then “Fuck”

I never watched him until he showed up on Conan for a very funny Clueless Gamer segment. All that time I thought his name was PewDiePew until I actually heard it read aloud.

Muhammad Alli