This is great news. I’ve been dying for more specific details about this relationship for years, and I will gladly pay money to hear more about it because I’m a nosy bitch.

I didn’t think she was being serious. She has a long and wonderful history of being a smart ass on twitter

He’s gone on record before talking about suffering from depression, so I’ll start with that one.

Well, although his district is overwhemingly red (Republicans almost always win the general), he did win his 2014 primary by only 38 votes...

Your friends are not a universal sample of all women. It’s as ridiculous as saying, “None of my friends have heavy periods or get bad menstrual cramps, therefore I just can’t believe that women with heavy periods or bad menstrual cramps exist!” Whether you or your friends have personally experienced something is not…

My little sister came home one day sobbing and said “my friend hung himself.” My mom patted her on the shoulder and said, “hanged.”

I have never been afraid of police. I’m a black woman from the Midwest. But I’m seriously afraid of them now. On related note, my 11 year old nephew learned that he was moving (just from the Midwest to the South but initially the though maybe they’d be moving out of the country) and his response to my sister was “I’m…

yes, that is exactly what I said.

Next up: “E.L. James and Niall Leonard replace Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan with themselves. ‘We both acted in grade school, so we’re bringing the A-game to the films that they deserve.’”

To be fair, I would also be “freaking the fuck out” if a company had repeatedly tried to charge $12,000 to my credit card. And based on my personal experience with Uber being terrible at handling customer complaints, I wouldn’t exactly feel assured simply because someone from Uber told me that they were escalating my…

I had a doppelganger in Chicago whose name was Jackie and worked for UBS. At the time, I worked at Merrill Lynch. We never met, but about once a month, some stranger in a bar would approach me and start talking to me like I was Jackie.

I would like to take this day to reflect on my Ex. The Ex who I realized was cheating on me only after close inspection of my family plan phone bill. I noticed that, upon getting off the phone with me in the wee hours of the morning, he would always proceed to call the exact same phone number. He would talk to…

My ex-wife texted me this news this morning. We're going to dinner to celebrate....her with her boyfriend and me with anyone I can find.

I was raised in a Pentacostal church, washed in the blood of the lamb, raised within a spirit-filled congregation, speaking in tongues, praying in the spirit, being healed in God’s merciful light. When I was a struggling, almost-suicidal 21 year old who had never had a relationship, I went to the front during the…

This legit happened to me - I was on the window and another girl was on the aisle, with the Orthodox gentleman assigned to the middle seat...on something like a 12 hour flight. What was crazy is that he just wanted one of us to give up our prime seats so he didn’t have to sit between two women. This girl and I…

Dear Men Assholes of America,

I had a table once whisper loudly to their children, "if you don't go to college, you'll end up waiting tables like her..." while I was prebussing their table.

Worst place I ever got sick was camping in the Sierra Mountains with my family. After a week of camping, on our last night, I was struck with a really nasty stomach bug. We had spent the afternoon drinking margaritas, so when the first wave of nausea hit, I thought it was the tequila. But no. How I wish it had been…

I was in a band and on tour in the early 00’s. As we were leaving the western edge of Pennsylvania on our way to Dayton Ohio we gassed up at a station that had a hybrid Pizza Hut / KFC / and Blimpies food processing closet. Being a vegetarian roughly 5 hours from home I was overjoyed that the Blimpies, 1/3 of this…

The internet is more powerful than God.