She definitely acted like a grown-up confronted with a confusing and uncomfortable situation! I haven't been in a situation like that, but I've heard enough stories and met enough women who have to be sympathetic as well.

No we're not fine. Congratulations for the luck you must have had in life to believe that's the case, but it's so far from true. If you listen to the stories of other women (or read some statistics), I think you'll realise that.

And society! It's very important to talk to your kids, but the sad truth is that's not always enough. I haven't been sexually coerced or assaulted, but I've definitely had men breaching my boundaries and making me uncomfortable without saying no, for fear of being mean/rude/making the situation more uncomfortable -…

I can imagine the previous situations being much more "grey", but you're very right that there's no real reason to assume his version of events is true/right. It could have just been sexual assault, pure and simple.

That was fucking awful.

Yes that also happens. Did Ben Solo in ANY way argue that doesn't happen?

Exactly! So much important is lost in the conversation when people only focus on how to define sexual assault.

This comment made me google the origins of the term, and they don't seem to be quite that simple - there's no clear source for it. Still, I'm not going to use it.

I forgot that part. He actually stated his intent not to do anything sexual. That makes it so much worse.

Except it doesn't. Plenty of men have consensual sex as well as commit sexual assault. What he did before might have been consensual, it's just the he clearly doesn't make a point of making sure.

No it's not.

Great comment! I appreciate the reminder to focus on Hannah's experience, not defining Chuck's behaviour.

It's not exactly "Hanna's issue", it's a big issue in general that women often haven't learned to maintain their boundaries and say no. I really hope you don't blame your daughter if she has the same problem. That said, Chuck wasn't being much of a dick until he took out his, well, dick. So lying down on the bed was…

"He's not exactly Bing Cosby". Notice the "not".

I was worried by some of the descriptions of that after-talk, but that sounds like a fair description. The dude NEEDS to learn how consent works, but he's not evil. After all, the problem with rape culture isn't that there are too many evil men out there…

I thought she might want to, too, but it doesn't make his actions ambiguous. When he whips out his dick, that's not consensual, regardless of how she reacts afterwards. You can't give consent retroactively.

He said he wanted to be close to someone, and she abided. I think that's what happens a lot of the time - you want to please someone, maybe even be nice to them, and then they take advantage of it.

:(

I hope not!

And also don't use your position to manipulate people.