As much as I enjoy The Force Awakens, it does sometimes feel like the Asylum version of Star Wars in that major elements of the latter (Tatooine, the Death Star, the Emipre, the Rebellion) have been copied but with names just different enough (Jakku, Starkiller Base, the First Order, the Resistance) as to technically a…

It took me way too long to realize she died of a broken heart.  I thought it was Anakin choking her.  My original idea was less dumb.

multiple scenes end with characters finishing a conversation and then just idly standing there for a few seconds before the cut.

Anyone who wants to tell me that the sequels were worse than this flaming sack can exit

“She is losing the will to live.”

The complaint is that he wasn’t able to execute on it. Making politics—particularly the politics of a fictional body that nobody’s familiar with and nobody can look up in a history book—an understandable and semi-realistic part of your film is hard, and Lucas didn’t manage it.

One of my favorite Ben Burtt designs is in Attack of the Clones when they drop the seismic charger in the asteroids, and the sound cuts out for a second right before it goes off. I always thought that was really cool. 

A friend and I were the first people in Chicago to get in line for Phantom Menace tickets. We brought a tent and slept on the sidewalk from Saturday through Wednesday. We were on tv a few times, Roger Ebert came down to hang out for a bit (he famously didn’t care for superfandom of any type, but he was an invested and…

Maybe! But if so, they were in for the long con. They even brought “ghost hunters” into the shop, who came with a little ghost detector thingy and measured our ghost levels. No joke.

I did eat a clown once. It tasted funny.

If this were a TV show, critics would complain that the writing was too on the nose.

If conservatives didn’t rock out to songs about what lousy people they are, they’d never get to rock out at all.

Yeah you can use it to run your lesbian hook up site or your gig economy home cleanup site

You can finally be awake in about five seconds.

I never hear about Lana Del Ray ANYWHERE ELSE besides the AVClub, who write news articles about her entirely to insult her.

It’s not in the top ten priorities for equality, but I really think just normalizing the odd same sex encounter for straight people the way most gay people have had participated in at least some kind of hetero activity would help everybody. It would reduce the gay panic that’s still prevalent in lot of the country,…

Ha! At least the ghost was polite. Can you imagine trying to find and clean up ghosts poops?

I found the Devil in the coal mine story cool in an old-school, Southern Gothic kind of way. Do I actually believe the Devil was in a coal mine? Not at all lol. And yeah, the gas station one was the best. It also didn’t sound especially believable (and read like a few well-known urban legends I’ve heard) but I’m more…

Now rank every “Treehouse of Horror.”

I don’t believe the “Uncle Billy” one, sorry. It sounds like every stereotype about traumatized, mentally-ill soldiers crammed into one story. Like you really think the guy is responsible for gutting a “murder victim” and you don’t call the police? You change your name, but somehow a guy who can’t even connect to…