Michael Myers: Have we done hair up, glasses off?

Debating whether or not he’s sincere is pretty pointless considering the damage he causes is the same whether he’s sincere or not.

I’ve seen it written (In Knights of the Dinner Table) as “Monty Haul.”

All Goats Go To Heaven

It can be two things...

Hugh Hefner will be buried between a mattress and box spring.

It was implied.

Only if I never have to offer to pay. Not once.

Hire a sex worker!

And like a fool I bought into the self-sealing stem bolt economy.

How will World of Warcraft prove the world is flat?

—Chris Evans

How do you keep up with comparative religion like that?

You have to wear them while sleeping in an oxygen tent for sexual powers.

Is soup forbidden if you drink it out of a mug?

Looks like the return of your full username is the only positive we get from Kinja.

I stay safe by always adding the word “feet” to my Avril Levigne searches.

On tonight’s episode: Jamie Lee stores her Activia in the cadaver cooler with hilarious consequences.

And where’s my Indiana Jones Gin?

These days? Mostly the State Fair / casino circuit.