My sincerest hope is that one day we will all remember that dating other people is SORT of the point of breaking up, and then we will see headlines like, “Famous Person on Famous Former Sex Partner Having New Sex Partner: MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.”

Ok, well, that yacht crowd is now and forever my answer to “which five celebrities would you want to have dinner with.”

After all these years, never fails.

I need this on a t-shirt or a patch or needlepoint pillow, STAT. It’s beautiful.

His supervillain hideout is almost complete, and they need to create a distraction so that their nemesis, the Giant Magnifying Glass, can’t find it just by analyzing the paparazzi photos of Amber Heard. Duh.

Fake news.

I feel like the lede here should be “Conor Oberst was falsely accused of rape, and OH HEY uses the opportunity when asked about it to be publicly compassionate toward women who’ve been assaulted.”

Hello, I would like to subscribe to your newsletter, in which you include new chapters of this, the most perfect sequel in the world. Please and thank you.

I JUST got used to her having blonde hair, even though Scary Movie came out 17 years ago.

I know several couples who split up shortly after their second or third child was born because it turns out that when someone begrudgingly agrees to have another child, their concerns around having said child can turn into resentment. Being on separate pages re: kids is a tough, tough thing to work through and bring…

Wait is roller skating coming back? In the “Fridays at Skateland, all going in the same direction, then stopping to do the hokey pokey, asking the DJ to play the Flintstones theme song remix” sense? Because if so my weekends just got a whole lot better.

I’m not certain she’ll actually see jail time. She’s out through the appeals, which will take a while, and I wouldn’t be surprised if her time isn’t reduced. To be clear, I don’t think jail time is necessarily what’s appropriate for her. But I also think given her previous statements her jail time would be less…

Honestly, the only parts of her sentence I think she’ll see as punishment are the social media prohibition and the ban on making money off her story.

I love when conservative Christian organizations and people claim to teach “Judeo-Christian” lifestyles. They get so bent out of shape when you call them on the “Judeo” part and point out that Jews are frequently not down with what they’re doing.

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Something about that just punches me right in the gut. I’m so sorry they are going through this, but I’m so glad they have each other.

Her stepsister was my babysitter growing up. They were not secretive about it. It’s interesting to me that it’s so hush hush now.

If we’re looking for more Leah Remini, may I request a show updating us on what Stacey Carosi from Saved by the Bell is up to?

I remember there being a LOT of concern when Saving Private Ryan came out, to the point where the VA increased staffing of their counseling hotline, and that was more than fifty years after D-Day. Anecdotally, my dad was enlisted during WWII and a movie buff, and refused to watch a lot of war films (and he never even…

There’s a cruel irony that a glioblastoma is what took down Ted Kennedy just as the ACA was being negotiated.