I interviewed Anthony Bourdain and he was an absolute delight to talk to. He was very kind and patient and gave all the credit to his helpers. I was ready to toss down my pen and notebook and follow him around the world.

I ushered at a Performing Arts Center in a small college town. For most shows, we were strictly front-house, but for one very special show, they said they needed a few people to guard backstage doors in case the madding crowds tried to sneak in. The show: Bill Cosby doing standup. Thus I was backstage when Mr. Cosby…

My mental age is 9

Me too. They need to be the starchy ones, though, not the ugh goopy ripe ones.

Is this the famous "I.P. Freelee"?

Some of the most boring people on earth are food and exercise obsessed. I knew this woman who would tell you about her running workouts such detail that it was practically real time - a 45 minute run would take her that long to describe. Ugh, what a bore. I would run to avoid having to listen to her!

Banana haters unite. I only eat them if they are almost crisp, so there's no banana smell nastiness.

Quick, throw a bucket of water on her and maybe we'll never have to hear about this nonsense again.

And over 5000 cals in just bananas. This is a very odd diet.

She had a nice recovery. I suspect Cirque de Soleil of malice, too!

I aim to please!

Right? I lead a fairly unconventional life (to some people - to me it is pretty plain and safe) and there are certain family members and ex-friends who go out of their way to make me feel like shit. So fuck those people. If people try to police your body FUCK THEM (not literally, because they'd probably be bad in bed,…

And I want a job that allows me to travel internationally while hanging out with my family and friends and doing basically whatever I want. As long as we're wanting things, I figure I might was well throw that out there ;-)

Ah, spring break. That awesome time of year when we lower-middle-class students had plenty of hours to work at low-wage jobs to earn some extra money! There was always time to drink late at night in the park behind the tennis courts, though.

Tell her to read this article on why she probably won't make much money. I have a lot of friends who blog, as do I. Everyone pretends like they're making money, but once I admit that I have made enough to buy a monthly lunch on, you should see them relax. People start saying "Yeah, I made like $150 last year."

Some funny people made a parody. 7 minutes of fun.

Everything else is in there - why the heck not? (she said, pretending like she knows what The Punisher is).

In improv, the "backwards scene" game (usually beginning with a dead person lying on the floor) always defeated me. It was too much for my tiny brain.

I'm so glad that Adriean Payne and MSU took the time to give her joy while she was here.

Right? When you don't grow up with the bible and then read it as an adult, it's a freaky chamber of horrors. It makes Grimm's Fairy Tales seem like Mr. Rogers.