Wow. You don't find loyalty like that every day. You're a good person.

Way to be supportive, MOM. Yeesh.

My ex said "You're the only person I know who yells "SHIT" every time the phone rings."

My parents were really good parents, the best they could be with what they had. They deserve/deserved to have a kid who treats them well and takes care of them in their old age. I just have to get my emotional & intellectual needs met elsewhere.

EXACTLY! Thank you for understanding! My folks did the best they could and I know that, but their best was not what I needed, so I feel like I mostly raised myself, emotionally and intellectually. When people say "My parents are my BEST FRIENDS," I'm jealous because I have no idea what that is like.

I have talked to my folks pretty much every day for the last 10 years, and had seen them almost as frequently (Dad died a couple of years ago). It's mostly a chore. My parents are nice people, but my dad never developed much emotional capacity and wasn't much of a talker, and my mom, bless her, just isn't very bright.…

I was kind of flummoxed when a server in Virginia asked me if I wanted ice with my red wine.

Yes, but they're common enough in salads that if you are deathly allergic, you'd think to mention it.

(Working in a copy shop. Power is out) "Oh come ON. Don't you have any copiers that don't run on electricity?"

"What's your evidence for creationism?"

He gave up trying. The process was just too long. He went to work somewhere else.

I want her to have MY baby, and I'm a girl. Who doesn't want kids. But damn.

A friend started the application process. Time from start to finish was over 6 months. Not terribly efficient. One day, they told him to show up for an unspecified reason, took away his phone and kept him for 4 hours (a day when we were supposed to meet up and I was freaking out because he's never not available by…

Yes, and Ira was so flabbergasted that David Rakoff had more T than he did.

They should hire my dog. She's a great judge of character and never steers me wrong. Just yesterday, she snapped at my landlord. She's probably as pissed as I am about the shower tile situation.

The "This American Life" episode called "Testosterone" is a must-listen.

I heard about the shoot from some friends who live up there.

I can tell the difference between good tea and bad tea, but at the end of the day I'm always Team Coffee.

That's why the proper term is "Masala chai" for the spicy stuff, I think.

When you say the "Los Angeles Angels" to anyone, you're talking like an idiot. Anaheim4eva