What part of the article is inaccurate?

Great question. Once they're attached, each spin is performed by a surprise guest and the contestant must guess their identity (a la What's My Line) before the wheel stops spinning if they want to walk away with the prize (usually uncooked meats, sometimes cash amounts up to $17).

Johnson? More like Johnson.

Refenestrates?

Mount up

HIS EMAILS

Show me hump!

Cuck

Wheel of Torsion? Hold your horses, I've only just announced it.

This seems as good a place as any to announce my latest public access TV venture, a gameshow called Wheel of Torsion. The object of the game is to use crocodile clips to attach contestants' testicles to a giant wheel, then to spin the wheel and see where it lands. I anticipate victory in the inevitable lawsuit brought…

As Oliver points out, Sinclair is attempting to purchase Tribune Media as we speak

Dogs die for glorious communist future, Americans put dog in bread and eat hot dog because they starve under capitalism

Decadent American space ship cannot withstand little wood shaving! Glorious space ship of communism 100% immune to tiny wood shaving!

Young Hovis

I got this French stick that love to French kiss
She thinks she's wurzelbrot, wear her dough in a twist
"Ma belle baguette, tu es cherie"
Ciabatta R-E-S-P-E-C-T me

Concrete jungle wet dream tomato?

Zach and CUCK

Oh Mr Coogin, I bet you say that to all the girls!

Trump is a scatological pervert.

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