I’m not even sad but gimme dat.

Your mom did a pretty shitty job of raising a compassionate, well rounded human. Someone here should grow up, but it isn’t these dads trying to do right by their kids.

Hey, if there’s two things that stop the minute you get into prison, it’s taking drugs and getting pregnant, Definitely two things that don’t happen in women’s prison at all.

This is the most California thing that’s ever California-ed.

My first response was, “You are MAKING THAT SHIT UP!” except then I remembered you’d mentioned this was LA.

I Am Contrite.

That place sounds like shite. And arse.

Oh, for fuck’s sake.

Nooooo. No. Nonononon Noo. LORD JESUS IN HEAVEN ABOVE I’VE SINNED HARD ALL MY LIFE BUT HELP ME NOW

That menu makes me want to die.

Wait, wait, wait. You mean to tell me that the essentially microscopic amount of gluten that might get “cross contaminated” with gluten-free bread would be sufficient to affect someone with Celiac disease? I find that extremely hard to believe.

Possibly staffed by graduates of Los Feliz Daycare?

Stores like this are secretly a great help to the community. You just have to watch the store closely to see who frequents it, and then you have an entire list full of people that you should avoid in the future.

Do you know what gluten is?

For what it is worth, this guy is a lawyer.

I know people who are very explicitly planning their families so they don’t have more than one child in daycare at a time. Given their ages, this means quite a few of them are having one child instead of two or two children when their ideal family size was more like three.

one shitton is 1000 assloads, don’t you even know units

ikr? devil himself evicts his worst tenants, makes me imagine the opposite of this.

The writing on that one is the BEST. I lost it at fleeing the great Fucks Famine of 2015.

I don’t know that it would’ve been “OK,” but they wouldn’t have been followed out of the restaurant in the first place had they left even a decent tip.

Yep, it’s called taxis, uber or friend. You just pulled Pinkham’s law. Congrats.