"We shall come over."

BS: Lena, before we talk about that scene where Alison Williams is getting her ass motorboated in the kitchen, do you think the Celtics got enough for Jeff Green?

The funny thing is, if the goalie hadn't touched the ball with his hand before it going in the net, I still wouldn't have given a shit about this.

[checks driver's license]

I like to play this game where I ask myself what the single most inappropriate thing I could do at that given moment would be, and how people in the room would react. And don't be lazy... sure, helicopter dick is usually the obvious answer but have some fun with it. What if you just started holding hands with the…

Also worth mentioning one's seat position in the meeting. Do not sit next to your boss. Some think this is like hiding in their blind spot, but in reality, you have almost no way of doing any of the BS things mentioned that will get you out of additional busy work. Your meeting minutes have to be impeccable. And the…

God I hate the assholes who respond at the end of a meeting when someone asks, "Does anyone else have anything to talk about?" How about STFU and let us get out of this horrible waste of time.

Post game celebrations continue in Ohio State's dressing room.

"Oh wow. Must suck for the offense when the league makes an arbitrary rule that makes your job that much harder. (wanking motion)"- Every defender in the league.

He throws up once a week, because Craggs was born with a trick esophagus with a separate chamber where food will occasionally get lodged and cause severe acid reflux. When that happens, he has to head over to the bathroom to yak up a piece of chicken covered in throat mucus, and then go about his business.

Perhaps they sent the Vaseline because they know SweetWater drinkers always drink alone.

Swift's life has been spiralling downwards for awhile now. It looks like it may have finally reached the bottom.

It has been nigh 30 years since I've felt qualified to post. Sensing the impending response, it will be another three decades before I post again.

He doesn't care about any law, even the law of gravity.

which one gave you more explosive diarrhea?

{weeps}

I'm all for the convenience, but I was kinda looking forward to the whole "jerk it in a designated medical jerking room" situation.