Good luck. I got ungreyed on io9/gizmodo first, then back to the greys. I set off the nerd rage somewhere. Ungreyed next on concourse/deadspin. I have no chance on Splinter/Root/Jezebel. The commentariat over there is a bit too self-serious. Maybe Jalopnik.

I’m getting more nervous about the future of Deadspin, tbh. These guys needed her more than they admit here, I think. Who’s gonna be the “stick to sprotz” EIC now? 

You think that fucker gets shit (“dirty looks”) for wearing a Texans NFL-brand jersey celebrating the slack-witted racist-in-chief? He gets random high fives every block.

WTF even is a Texan? You may think their mascot is meant to be a steer’s head, but it is in fact just the belt buckle of a racist yokel who judges everyone by whether they add beans to their meat-and-tomato-sauce spiced stew.

They’re *afraid* that he might come out more popular, because Clinton did, and they only “logic” available to them is the hasty generalization fallacy. He would definitely be impeached, and he would definitely not be convicted by the Senate. That doesn’t mean you don’t impeach. There’s certainly a political argument…

Fuck. Then he uses the cutesy little “anecdata” portmanteau. Excellent use of “verbiage,” by the way, which is my 2nd-most-hated word.

Based on previous entries in this series, I’m assuming that after Chris’s dad stomped off, he was in an industrial accident, lost at least one limb, got divorced, and probably said nothing else to Chris other than “STOP THAT, YOU ASSHOLE” before never being heard from again.

Huh. So if you’re stupid enough to consider getting a tattoo of the Titans’ logo, you should get a tattoo of the Titans’ logo so that other people more quickly can identify you as someone stupid enough to consider getting a tattoo of the Titans’ logo. Got it.

If the mouth is just a container for teeth--a tooth-pouch, if you will--then it makes perfect sense. You just need more pouch space for all the teeth.

Yahoo isn’t an ISP. What he’s saying is that yahoo mail became the solution to the problem that Joel was talking about in his essay (which is almost 20 years old at this point).

The article was written in 2000, but that was after he had left Juno some time before. Yahoo mail, Hotmail, and finally Gmail ended ISP-specific email addresses, that’s for sure.

One of my favorite articles of all time is about the market-share grab made by Excel:

That was Bryan, and Bryan needs to give up on the Vikings and go make peace with Dad.

I know, right? And yet we all know which one we’re talking about.

Probably, simply because “Christian” doesn’t mean shit. People call themselves “Christian” without ever touching the Bible. Some of them ignore the New testament, and some of them never fucking leave Leviticus. My original answer was Jesus, and then I got thrown off by the whole “yeah, but Abraham and Moses bring the…

Guys? I think we need to look out for Sam. That’s just brutal.

Bryan, you definitely caused your parents’ divorce, and your mom was only trying to be nice.

In short, the Browns are the reason that I am a licensed clinical psychologist today.

Came here to say this. Gary, don’t trust an Eric who can’t even spell his fucking name right.

But remember that Jesus shows up in Islam as a respected figure. Someone else rightly pointed out that Abraham and Moses show up in Judaism, Christianity, and Islam, so they beat Jesus and Mohammed easily.