He shouldn’t stay with you and you being drunk isn’t an excuse for being abusive.

Swap the roles around, would you still not consider it abuse?

Or more that they’re not allowed to defend themselves, so when some psycho does attack them, they can’t do a damn thing or else they’re the bad guys.

Sure, if she said stuff to antagonize him and if HE hit her, he’d be a an absolute scumbag for it. But if you change their genitals then it’s suddenly okay. Grow up you child.