You're not screwing anything up. Online dating is just fickle as a pickle.

So basically it's the Apple equivalent of Windows 7 versus Windows 8?

How do we know he didn't break character or ask her to stop at some point? Or was drunk or high, at the time? Or was alone in a room with a bag on his head doing a performance piece and was caught off guard by the violence? He doesn't give that many details of what actually happened. He just says he was raped and it…

I was thinking the same things as you, don't worry. Say Marina wanted to charge the person who stuck her with rose thorns with assault. Would it hold up? She never gave them permission to hurt her. She gave them permission to do whatever they like with her, but does that mean a person could still break the law and…

You're right. Also, sometimes when someone is being raped, they're so in shock that it's actually happening that they can't do anything about it. They're just too unable to process what is happening because they didn't expect it to happen. My guess is a lot of men experience this when they get raped, because they…

There's about a thousand reasons why a person with a bag over their head in a locked room with someone who is assaulting them might not react by screaming and fighting and running. We all should know by now that asking why the victim didn't this or that perpetuates the idea that there is one correct way to react to…

Right, because they probably also didn't say "please don't murder Shia La Beouf" and no one tried to kill him (as far as we know) so like you said, there is that unspoken fine print as to what is or isn't okay, acceptable or excusable, and obviously rape falls in that category. I just... I feel like there's no real…

I'm glad that you wrote this, because I asked myself the same thing. Then, I thought, wait, maybe he was paralyzed by fear, or was in a space of "WTF-is-this-really-happening?" So, thank you for the perspective.

Would they be saying the same thing if he were a woman we all think is an asshole?

Yup. If you say that to your hairstylist do they get to have sex with you? It was said in the context of an art show. srsly. wow.

I got into this exact same conversation not long ago. Except someone was asking "What was going through that woman's head that Cosby would rape her and she'd go see him again?"

"Is that a sexual assault?"

Really? So he could only be sexually assulting if his penis entered her vagina? I think that is a very limited view of sexual assult.

So much this right here.

If you think that the only possible way a woman can sexually assault a man, you need a reality check.

It is sad that this needs to be stated, especially here. The articles first comments were very dismissive and that people didn't believe him. That breaks my heart.

Believe victims, guys. Even if we don't like who they are as people, or they're "tryhards" or their art is dumb. Believe them.

Rape victims are treated like garbage by the vast majority of police, we just went over this with the Cosby case. What happened to Shia is not okay and I hope he gets connected with whatever supports he needs.