OMG what is this world coming to when I’m like hell yes, Lindsay Graham. I need to lay down.

Omar from The Wire was legit ruthlessly gay.

I get why Alaska won but I really wanted it to be Katja. I also learned to appreciate Alyssa this season.

How do I star this 11ty times?

Maaan, it would be very therapeutic if there was a new season of Drag Race airing right now.

The enhanced bitch face I woke up with on Nov 9 appears permanent.

Friend to friend, if you put a small piece of toilet paper in the water before a violent poop, it breaks the surface tension of the water and prevents “Poseiden’s Kiss”.

This is really the part of Jezebel that analytics fail to quantify into valuations: the poop joke quotient.

OMFG I FOUND MY PERSON IN THE POOP THREAD.

My husband refers to that as “winning the game.” I’m not sure what game that is, but it sounds gross.

What about those of us who have been shitting plenty, but they aren’t good poos? They’re all sludgy and leave you feeling gross rather than invigorated, which is how a poo SHOULD make you feel.

That is the purpose of poop.

sheesh, she said it was anusdotal, didnt she?

I made an account just to say this thread is the first thing that has actually make made me laugh out loud, like, a full belly laugh, since Tuesday. Also I just learned just how mature I am.

(I realize no one will see this. But thanks anyway.)

Yesterday I finally managed to choke down six ravioli, so now I don’t just need to constantly shit water and blood. And my face looks fucked up. For some reason one of my eyebrows has swollen up like there’s a goddamn grape under my skin. I don’t just look puffy-eyed and blotchy, I look misshapen. And that’s not even…

Every day?!

Thank you for writing this because I haven’t had the desire to since I heard the news. I was starting to think something was actually wrong with me.

nah

Well you came and you gave without taking...but I sent you away, oh Randi

You’re right!