Mark Davis either sleeps in a bed shaped like a race car or on a bed made from the skin of missing women.

Just like this weekend, you will lose to the Bears and Virginia McCaskey.

So good. I hate myself for not thinking of a Lions joke in this.

That *would* be a great game.

I think Elway might be even higher — if I recall, he went through some dark times during his divorce.

Draft Kings should have a daily fantasy game for which NFL executive gets accused of sexual harassment. You gotta figure Jerry Jones is somewhere around an $8,500 to $9,500. Elway is $7,500 to $8,000. Richardson would have been great value at $6,000. Irsay and Haslam probably $6,500 for past bad acts. I bet the…

No joke- my brown/white mixed family was denied cutlery at a Denny’s in Maryland, while tables all around us got theirs.

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Yeah, who are we to judge the actions of a staunch supporter of racial segregation?

I reeeeeaaaalllly hope it’s with men. I mean, we’re all not lucky enough for that, but it would be nice.

Steve Smith: released by the front office

A man who only made all his restaurants desegregate because it started hurting the stock price and looks like the bad guy in a puppet Christmas special is a monster? Total shock here

He molested Papa John over a bowl of green peppers

Given the timing, I have to assume that the allegations are of sexual workplace misconduct.

I believe there was a course in Navy basic about how you need to replace/insert as many words as possible in every sentence with profanity. The first time I called my mother after boot camp, I was on my second f-bomb before I remembered who I was talking to.

A good soldier can curse for 15 minutes straight without repeating themselves or being profane.

the general doldrums of life are exacerbated by the idiocy of youth

What are the top jobs where cursing is totally ok? I feel like pro sports, politics (behind the scenes), and writers are top pics. I’m a speech therapist who’s only worked in schools and clinics so the idea of cursing at work is so alien to me.

EVERY job in the military requires copious amounts of profanity. I don’t care if you put two GI’s in charge of running a day care center, those fuckers will spew curse words like broken main.

Being stuck in a Cheesecake Factory forever would be like being the dude who couldn’t read because his glasses broke after the nukes went off. Everything’s on the menu, but it all tastes like shit.