Anything west of Bellevue is Arkansas to me so I can’t comment on that.

I prefer to go with “unique and precise”.

Besides, it’s less weird than the University of South Florida being in fucking Tampa.

It was out of his hands with .1 second left.

These creatures (apparently, as I’m far from an expert) draw power simply from the fear inspired by their existence, so even talking about them (with rational, intelligent people, anyway) makes them stronger.

Pretty sure a 12 year old looking at a dick on a cell phone is both illegal and horrible parenting. Where do you live, I can anonymously call Child Protective Services.

Deadspin continues its slow migration toward becoming PrepHighlightsCentral.com.

So, uhh, that was a charge right?

You’re with me, bogey.

Maybe he was the misfit cop who really wanted to be a dentist.

She killed my Brother in a knife fight in Saigon, back in ‘73 and on that day I swore revenge. Now, 43 years later, my opportunity is here and bitchy internet comments are my weapon of choice.

Timothy, I can’t for the life of me understand how you can sit thru a football game. Your squeamishness towards hits and your unhealthy obsession of the concussion issue must make it impossible for you to enjoy a game. If it’s that torturous for you, and if the NFL and the networks are so demonic in their support of…

Every good gambler knows not to walk away from the table when you’re up.

Major League Baseball has had ONE fucking rule that gets a person banned for life. It’s posted on the entrance to every clubhouse and has been for roughly 100 years now: A) Don’t bet on baseball. B) Don’t get too cozy with gamblers.

Good. Baseball’s got one rule for a lifetime ban. One. How hard is that?

This is perfect for me because I can only get off on my own smug sense of superiority.

I am serious. And don’t call me Shirley.

It’s true. This man has no dick.

Stan, when you were a baby your father looked down on you in your crib and thought, someday you’ll grow to be a man. Well look at you now. You just got your asses whipped...by a bunch of god damned nerds. Nerds!