Hey can I be a pedantic fuck too? It’s pretty easy to copy and paste definitions. Here I got one for you.

I have a buddy whos wife bought him an echo for his birthday. His name is Alex. So every time his wife yells at him from across the house, “HEY ALEX”, it activates. I found it hilarious, he turned it off after two weeks.

I’ve been calling our local Subaru dealer to get these fucking airbags replaced every couple of weeks for over a year now. Every single time the answer is “We don’t have the parts but we’ll call you when we do.” They have never once called me back.

No bystanders were injured, so not a Mustang.

This is working out to be one of my favorite weeks of the past 14 months. I wish I could compress these stories into an sensual massage oil to rub all over my body, so good.

My crew and I have had to insta-brig a couple people, but it’s always when we’re waiting for a 4th man who’s 20 minutes away or something. Since the game doesn’t let anybody join a three man galleon crew we start a 4 man crew, insta-brig anyone who joins, and nicely explain that we’re waiting on someone and they…

Been getting this email (“Your account has been locked for 120 minutes”) every couple of days for the past 2 weeks. Luckily I refuse to pay a single red cent for any of this freemium trash and never connected any payment options. Changed my password just in case and went on with life.

Paul Manafort right now.

Ban semi-auto rifles, if you can’t work a bolt you shouldn’t be shooting at anything anyway. Institute Australian style buy-back program. 12 months later, make civilian ownership illegal, class a misdemeanor $10g fine and a year in prison. That’d solve a lot of problems. To those who’d say “If you make guns illegal…

Lol, reminds me of a time me and an ex were getting busy when she suddenly realized “oh shit, supposed to be getting ready to raid right now”. She insisted we keep going while she played on a laptop but her orc shaman(or whatever, never played WoW myself) just wasn’t doing it for me.

When I was growing up it specifically referred to any punch that the victim couldn’t have seen, anticipated, or defended themselves from. Usually reserved for someone getting punched in the back of the head. Similar but not quite the same as a “cold-cock”, where someone is punched before any other indication of…

Sauce: www.bbc.com/news/amp/world-middle-east-41742785

It says in another article that the seller is the messenger’s nephew.

Never, ever bring bananas on the boat.

Man I’m late to the game, and my story’s not exactly ‘car’ related but it was a sort of vehicle. Went moose hunting in Denali National Park a year ago. We’re about 12 miles from anything that could even be considered a road, 25 from cell service. My Father and I are sharing a 4 wheeler, headed back to town after…

Yeah, I know ;) but I’ve never seen this particular version before, it’s good copypasta

This is delicious, thank you.

So I already replied with my “bad trip”, but I wanted to add that I have driven while on mushrooms. Looking back it was probably one of the top 10 dumbest things I’ve ever done, but there a few mitigating factors. First being that the road was in the middle of bumfuck nowhere. A huge 8 mile long, looping dirt road…

The closest I’ve ever come to a “bad trip” wasn’t on acid or shrooms, but on Robotussin. My friends and I had rented a house in a resort town for a winter and were severely deficient in mind-altering drugs so we got a bit desperate. So we each drink a bottle of the stuff, it’s still light out, we’re mostly having a…

I spent many an hour tripping, listening to music on an Xbox and watching the visualizer. Truly mesmerizing.