You’re welcome! I hope you enjoyed my performance in the movie Baseketball. Please accept this star and comment as your prize for guessing my secret identity.

Do we really need the term “neo-racist”? I thought plain old “racist” still works pretty well.

Well, now I feel like an idiot for getting my kid a flu shot. May as well prep for her future autism.

Oh, lord yes we see it. And we marvel at your tenacity.

I needed that. Someone is actually wailing and clawing at me right this second.

Then I’m not going to bother watching it.

I want to see someone carrying a sign that says, “Every baby is a nightmarish hellbeast bent on your destruction.” I have a 9-month-old, coincidentally.

I’m not a Meyer fan, but I think you make a great point. We need glittering vampires. But why stop there? We also need glittering werewolves, glittering zombies, sparkling ghosts, mad scientists covered in sequins, sharknadoes taking place in craft supply stores - EVERYTHING IS GLITTER FOREVER.

Okay, here’s what I don’t need in my supernatural thrillers: more Mormon writers. Here’s something no one ever says: “Oh, Buffy the Vampire Slayer was all right, but I sure wish a repressed woman from a bizarre religion had been in charge of it.”

You probably already know about Captain Awkward, but that’s my go-to.

I feel more like my true, authentic self when I’m alone.

It seems like I always star the commenters who can use mind control, but I’m not sure why.

You make a good point, but I am going to go ahead and not imagine that. *shudders*

I feel like no one at Jezebel is going to say, “Yep, it’s too early to start drinking,” especially today.

<3

That’s so brave! Aren’t you worried about people doxxing you?

I’m honestly jealous.

FWIW, (nothing!) I really liked Dry, and I don’t usually like memoirs.

“death is brung”

The most important thing is that we have a coven.