I hereby challenge all conservative patriots to protest woke culture by sleeping through the next election day!

Nah he’ll be on kid.rock/jizz.org

I’m convinced at least one of those accounts is a sitting republican governor. Probably the one with the worst spelling.

Ah, remember the good old days of 2016 when we thought things couldn’t get any stupider? How blissfully naive we were...

One only wishes this bitch fight were occurring on a cliff overlooking a punji stick collection.

“Please clap”

It has been said much of the violence in the middle east will end when “Mothers decide they love their sons more than they hate their enemies.” This is where rethuglicans are now, allowing hate to overcome love.

Just how tiny is your dick?

He would have been such a good father, right? He’s probably a lot like you. A nothing, worthless, little boy who can’t make anyone happy. You’re not good at anything. Your family hates you. Everyone is so repelled by you that you’ll never know the love of another human being. We all know it would be better if you…

“Pro-life” ends the moment the baby is born.

Nothing says pro-life like actual murder.

You’re a real bummer and it’s starting to affect my sex life. Anytime I’m laying pipe in your dad he always says something like, “I’m really worried about Sam, maybe you can talk to him.” I get it, you’re an embarrassment to your family and everyone you’ve ever met, but maybe it’s time to just end the whole thing. You…

Oh sure, when she orgasms to Tchaikovsky’s 5th everyone thinks it’s fine, but when I do the same to the 2003 comedy film Beethoven’s 5th I get thrown out of my nephew’s birthday party.

Nikki Haley is only dressing up like a decent person.

These shameless people need to get a fucking grip.

That’s a horrible thing to say and a libelous insult! No self-respecting colostomy bag would spew as much shit as Mike.

Mike, taking time out of his attempts to overthrow the government, to remind us that he is still a sentient colostomy bag.

What message does this Pentagon policy send to female service members who are or may become pregnant?