Fuck off, Terry

........yes?

That's just an "I farted and made Grandpa smell it quietly while posing for a portrait" look. 

What, no entry for "Picking back up on The Irishman around the 95th minute mark", or "Let's argue about Star Wars some more"?

Dr. Phil’s less-favored children?

Rudy: “Show me on this constitution where Donal touched you.”

It is true: Schrodinger can't carry a tune.

I think that Coach Stringer figured if she said nothing, some usual suspects will come at her for “not being gracious”.

Slightly surprised the ALL-KIDNEY GRILLE X7 didn’t make the cut. A neighbor got one and his kids bitch that the parents up front can’t hear the kids talk to them from the 3rd row.

I started a few paragraphs going into active vs passive/oblivious racism, etc.

I’ve finally trained myself to not click on Deadspin, so I pretty much start at “fuck those assholes”.

Jesus, I remember wondering who are these people who find disagreement on a movie to be such a personal/performative insult.

Prediction: Michelle Obama will one day meet Phoebe Waller Bridge and say “I get it, but it was awkward to watch with my kids”, PWB turns to the camera and replies “Of course, but you got it, like the real one, so the rest of us have to make do.”

Did they splice in a scene from Die Hard? Lethal Weapon? No? Then it's not the best holiday movie.

“Dear Salty,

The next time I have a chance, I’ll reprogram a restaurant’s check printouts to say “DEMAND LETTER - WTO TERMS APPLY”.

The good news is that all the hard work is for you. Also your dog. But mostly for you.

An African or a European Postal Jeep?

Sounds like letting them kill each other would be a better plan, no? 

“Other people tried to do right by you, and I did not fuck it all up like when I put you on the food bank lines this January. You’re welcome.