We envy you.

Damn you, Bootstraps Communism Hitler! You win EVERY argument!

You're a good parent. When I was 8, my parents handed me the "S" volume of our 1953 encyclopedia (this was the early 1990s) and told me to read the section about sex, and then left the room. I learned all about how to make soap that night, because I'd already read the sex section on my own, duh.

I've started a comment at least 8 times. I don't know what to say. I'm for artistic expression, but any moral compass would tell you this is 100% the glamorization of a brutal and horrifying crime. I'm also personally bothered by the fact that this stereotypically shows men as violent monsters. This is just wrong from…

When I was like 3 a sitter managed to let me wander out of the house and around town for what must have been about an hour before a very nice police officer stopped and picked me up (someone must have called…) I got to sit in the front passenger seat without a car seat while the officer drove me home (I was able to…

I get discharge stains. It also seems to turn darker shades lighter....like my discharge is bleach?

The women of the Supreme Court are really holding it down for Progressive Constitutional interpretation. More power to them. I met Sotomayor the other day; she is also awesome and brilliant.

Are you Ben Wyatt?!?

I woke up today without any pizza, and now my life is a goddamn mess. shrAAYBERRRR!!

Thank you for your response. Here are some ways you can combat the problems you are having:

3 weeks early as a matter of fact!

That sucks!

Seriously, what does one have to do to get fired from your office? Eat a baby at a board meeting?

Shots fired.

Nope, everyone loved and still loves Saved By The Bell. You must of been more of a Blossom type of kid.

HER NAME... HER NAME IS TOLFREE. TOLL FREE. THIS IS A STORY ABOUT A PHONE, AND THE PERSON'S NAME IS TOLL FREE.

Here are some of her more racier numbers (possibly NSFW)

The NFL kind of reminds of those dudes who say they "love women" because they love to have sex with them.

I appreciate your advice but I do not appreciate you saying my mom is right about something!!!

I love that he wastes so much time with tough-guy posturing, too. He makes sure we know he'll kick an ass if it touches one of his female possessions, though said possession could save him the trouble by rethinking her tone before it gets that far.