In 1998, Warner Brothers held their 75th anniversary film festival at the Fine Arts theater here in Chicago: 7 days full of Warner films, each day a different decade. I bought a pass and managed to see 3-5 movies per day. It was one of the best weeks of my life, and it contained the single greatest moviegoing…

1) Taking my much-younger brother to the Star Wars reissue, specifically the moment when the logo hits the screen and the orchestra hits and no matter how many times you’ve seen it, you get a little frisson of “here we go...” and looking over to see the magic on his face.

2) Sitting the front row of a packed theater…

A group of fish is called a school.

Or, as Homer said, “The blade by itself can draw a man to use it.”

The Stuff is a much better film than being given credit in this article, and Larry Cohen should really not be dismissed so casually — the man directed Black Caesar, Hell Up in Harlem, God Told Me To, Q: The Winged Serpent, and the hilariously inappropriate It’s Alive. Larry Cohen made sleazy pictures in a way nobody…

Guys guys guys, she would totally be pushing an MLM 

I recently heard “Bat Out of Hell” and “You Took the Words Right Out of My Mouth” on the radio and told my teenager how my friend & I used to love to drive around to that album in high school. And now I’m old & my friend and Jim Steinman are dead.

I seem to remember at some point he claimed he was the first white guy to open a karate dojo in Japan.  Which could well be true!  Doesn’t require much skill to stand on a busy corner in Tokyo and shout “my dojo is now accepting students!”

And then you’ve got the ones who’ll put Vaseline on the cans for wicked curves, but then chuck those jars of Vaseline.  It’s a continuous circle.  

“Bumble Bee brand tuna, and you can throw that, because you put a curve on it, you can do whatever you want.”

Interesting, I didn’t know any of that. Can’t believe the creator of Ghoulies lacks integrity :(

I had a very close friend in grade school through college who was “Courtney’d” by her mom and she was so beautiful and glamorous, etc., but she was bullied beyond what I’ve ever seen and that’s saying something because I was a chubby loudmouth in school. She did manage to escape her mom for a few years and turned out…

The new aristocracy is just like the old: Good King Tom is inevitably followed by Prince Chet the Bad.

People don’t know this, but bald eagles are dicks. They take massive shits wherever they want, and they scavenge trash harder than any seagull I’ve ever seen. The bald eagle is the perfect official bird of the United States.

4WD Delicas are great, in theory, but $10,000 for one with a broken air conditioning button is some kind of magical thinking.

No Crystal Light Roof, no deal. Sorry Delica.

There was a Cinerama in my hometown of Seattle that closed last year.

Molly overdose while skateboarding.

Yeah, we were all expecting it to be a motorcycle accident. Or crushed in a mosh pit.

The fact that Scott Rudin is a violent hot-headed prick is a well known fact, as widely acknowledged as Harvey Weinstein’s serial rape history. Why it’s getting the Hollywood Reporter front page treatment now is interesting. Someone finally decided that non-sexual assault in the workplace is noteworthy. He must not be…