I took the official Pepsi challenge many years ago. I chose Coke.

I was baiting a bit.

Ditto.

I usually just tell them I’m pregnant.

1. Roasted over a campfire. Crispy exterior, gooey interior. No debate.

The problem is that Trump has rallied the true believers. He’s full of shit, but they believe every word. He’s made it acceptable to be a bigot publicly. Every one of those sheep that have been listening to every word from conservative ideologues over the past decade are now whipped into a frothing frenzy whose…

For future reference, if there is ever the possibility that you may wish to pursue legal options, never write a long-winded story with the words “and its my own damn fault”

This is the dumbest thing Ive ever seen. Why would I ever get on a boat with a bunch of people like that? I mean the gubberment literally has us all in the same place and could take us all out at once.

When I first saw the “eye” I thought it was just a typical glitch. Nope. (I never met the kid)

If she dug a key into the side of your pretty little souped up four wheel drive, carved her name into your leather seats, took a Louisville slugger to both head lights or slashed a hole in all four tires – thats a woman you are much better off without.

I’ll second the Jazz Party Funeral. 90% of the people in that Second Line don't know the deceased anyway.

Please nobody cosplay as Robert Downey Jr. in Tropic Thunder. Please.

Im still attempting to find someone who can explain Common Core math to me without me hitting them in the face with a brick. I still don't understand it and Im running low on bricks.

For arguments sake:

This. You are thrown into a situation you weren’t mentally prepared for. Most people would:

Went with my mother to give blood at her Southern Baptist church once. She’s in the next booth perfectly able to hear my answers to the extremely personal questions they ask. A quiet ride home.

fiveleven

Eating a pound of carrots will turn everything orange. The more you know...

Went to the circus once. No show I have ever seen before or since beats the image of an elephant standing one-legged on a pedestal shooting projectile diarrhea in a fifty foot spray for a solid minute.

I’ve seen that dialogue. One of them is apparently a synth.