Yes, because that Scott kind without the cardboard tube is THE BEST.

I used to make a variation of this that we called Redneck Scallops: water chestnuts wrapped in bacon and brushed with bbq sauce. People can’t seem to get enough of them.

cute and fun on the top and “deny someone a marriage license” on the bottom

She clasps the slice with crooked hands;

you forgot Salma Hayek

I just re-watched Behind the Candelabra and I loved it even more the second time around. Michael Douglas surprised the shit out of me by taking on that role, and then completely blew my mind when he totally fucking OWNED IT.

This Is 40 was just painful to watch. The WHOLE THING was centered around Leslie Mann and Paul Rudd cussing at each other and everyone else in the movie. I honestly can’t believe I finished watching it.

Augggghhhhhrrrrrrrrrrrrr I remember that. Such bullshit.

Let’s all just stop pretending right now that virginal behavior will save us from harassment and abuse. It assuredly does not, online or in real life.

thank you so much for bringing this into my life

Pardon me, but I can’t help but notice that you’ve neglected to include Quantum Leap in your programming.

There are these commercials currently showing on Hulu (I think) for the men’s line of Dove stuff. They talk about how skin, like leather, is stronger when it’s hydrated.

.

How in the WORLD did I never know that Julie Andrews wrote Mandy?!?!?!?!?! That was my very favorite book as a kid. I think it would have blown my tiny mind to know that Mary freakin’ Poppins wrote it.

OMG THE HAY ROOM. She was a lunatic.

My aunt was good friends with him at UCLA and apparently everyone loved him then too. What a fox.

omfg I hate those things. “Ladies, is your neck just too slender?!? Wear this hideous plastic choker and you’ll have the bull neck of your dreams!”

My understanding is that in certain snake-loving circles, this is what is known as a boop noodle.

Also, NEVER NEVER EVER EVER EVER give your dog m(or cat) ibuprofen! It can cause a whole host of problems, up to and including seizures and death.

The fine folks over at www.reddit.com/r/JUSTNOMIL would welcome you with open arms. Your mom sounds unhinged.