One time I was reading this scary book about demons ( I am an asshole and never learn) and my son walked into our room with his blanket over his head, saying nothing. Just walking toward me.

I just spent a glorious hour reading the terrifying stories someone linked to on reddit about all the creepy shit a Search and Rescue officer supposedly encountered during his career. And I suddenly remembered something that used to scare the piddle out of me. And I’m gonna talk about it here because it stands a…

When I was reading the submissions last week by the light of my kindle, my poor husband sleeping sweetly beside me, one of my FUCKING CATS decided that was precisely the right moment to slink out of the darkness and silently jump up on the bed, quickly peering over the kindled like “oh hai! Whachureadin?” and I…

Hell is other people.

I’m American Indian. Ghost suppers are for our dead relatives because they're bothering us or we want to honor them. There is food.

ohmygod, mine is up there!

I love that this year, a number of the scariest stories centered on non-ghost incidents. The modeling gig... the poisoned uncle... a woman buried alive... a madman in the basement... Sometimes the spookiest stories are the ones about other humans.

Sorta related. I actually started wearing a fake about three years ago. Partly, it was working in sales/hospitality, and not wanting people to interpret my friendliness as anything more than that.* But I did notice the way I was treated changed — particularly by people who were older than I was. I got “sweetie”d and…

That’s a hell of a piece of writing, Stassa.

So it was Fostered from the English language.

(Sarah Koenig voice) But what would a woman who fux with boy shorts and pasties... be doing on Backpage?

I’ ve always been weary of the supernatural, anxious to find a reason behind the phenomenon, if only to keep myself from getting too scared. I have no logical explanation for what happens in my house. When we moved in, my oldest was 2. His bedroom closet has a small door in the back leading to the attic. My husband…

Not mine, but here’s an old family story that comes by way of my late Great-Grandmother, a hardy rural Yugoslavian woman if there ever was one.

Over the past year I started to have these really strange dreams, all involving a pale little boy dressed in dirty, old-timey clothes. At first they’d just be regular dreams where I would notice he’d show up (as in I’d have a flying dream or one where I’d be walking around a store and suddenly there he’d be). As soon…

Not scary at all but an update for those of you who remember my story from last year about our friendly ghost named Seymour:

I broke up with a friend who, as I was crying from being exhausted by the sexual harassment I was receiving in a muslim country on vacation, told me “you should be happy you’re getting attention, no one is even paying attention to me”. Fuck her and her fucking face.

If I’m paying 31 million buckaroos for my wedding, it must include Idris Elba interrupting the proceedings, declaring his everlasting love for me and marrying me on the spot while David Bowie sings “Life on Mars.” For starters.

Oh god, this is why I love Biore Pore Perfect strips. I bet they leave more gunk on my nose than they take off, but I fucking love using them.

Oh, dear. When I was 27, I was in love with a 38 year old man who had women on the side. It devastated me. I so regret wasting my late 20s on him. He may be charming, but there is something deeply wrong with him that he would do this to her and to you. At 38, he’s not going to change. Find someone with integrity. They…

i know this is kinda unpopular, but i am not super into female comedians who spend most of their material being self-depreciating. i also know that the reason that amy schumer (and i’m also thinking of tina fey circa 30 rock) reach so many people is because self-depreciation makes them less threatening to people…