My husband's aunt worked on the weather plans for D-Day.

Obligatory

I have never understood the appeal of Prince Harry. But now. I. DO. Best celebrity-baby encounter ever.

“I came here for easter service six years ago. it’s a big church with a past deeply rooted in [Redacted city] history. the sermon irritated me simply b/c it was religious and asked me to take a lot on faith (so i guess it was my problem with religion, not this church in particular)“

Adults who treat Easter eggs hunts like a compitition are the fucking worst. Your special snowflake baby Apsen/Dakota isn’t going to be upset they don’t have the most eggs especially since their main hobby is shitting and drooling.

“Restaurant food was decent but I had to provide my own bread and wine. The next day I was nailed to a plank of wood and died. Would not recommend.”

Let me tell you all about the last time I have ever eaten del taco:

Used to live on a golf course and three plus was what we’d do too - one suburban back yard, just off the 9th got a present one day at about 5:30 am. I’d already used the damn poo bag for the dogs.

FWIW, very few people can say they’ve barfed on a protected species.

This is simultaneously the worst and best thing I have ever read. I am crying.

First grade. Catholic school. Sitting in morning mass, we stood up and I puked in the seat of the pew in front of me. That nun jerked me out of church so fast she almost separated my shoulder. The trip across the playground back to the classroom was her berating me for coming to school if I felt badly and me heaving…

S/he's not real though. Is s/he? Judyj is just some weirdo troll.

I like how you remembered all the colors. You are my kind of person.

Yeah, that must have been really hard for you, having a cold while your friend was mourning the loss of a child. How did you and your expert husband and wonderful children ever cope with such a dilemma?

When I was 11 I went on a trip to Disneyworld with my family. Luckily for us, a shuttle launch was happening at Cape Canaveral one of the nights we were there, about an hour’s drive away. So, the night of the shuttle launch, after a long day of Disney-ing, we piled into the rental car and drove towards Cape Canaveral.…

it was a woman. A very petite, very mousey, very angry woman.

Last year my mother died suddenly. I had to fly across the country to try to sort out, well, everything. My brother was there and my mother’s friend, who thought he was going to executer who’s also brought over a bunch of what seems to be carnival workers to paw through my mother’s things. I’m physically unable to do…

I have a super dramatic fainting story. When I was in college, whenever I came home for breaks I had to go to church with my family (I was an atheist then as now, but it was a requirement of the house.) It was a super conservative catholic church with latin mass. It goes without saying there was to be no eating before…

I had to do a midterm speech for my public speaking class in college. Prof was insane and literally allowed zero make ups for midterm and final speeches. I was crazy sick with some God awful stomach virus. I went anyway, not wanting to fail. I was the color gray, clammy and so sick feeling. I ended up barfing on my…

I am the queen of IBS. When faced with a stressful event, I get really bad constipation followed by a diarrhea explosion. I usually make it in time, but here are my top two blowouts: