Do you want to watch months of meaningless games when the ultimate result is pretty much a forgone conclusion? I have a sport for you!

So since 1917? Hmmm, nothing I can think of. Checks out.

I 100% want this to happen

A few hundred thousand dollars of misinformation goes a long way in a country that makes ignorance and lack of education virtues.

Except Hample will actually deserve it

Seriously though, is he ever not squinting?

It’s cute that he thinks his mere presence confers dignity on anything, let alone a football game.

Oh certainly not, more of the most recent example.

Seriously, that new “thunder” song by them is god awful.

His schtick gets a little old at times, but it’s not that bad. I do appreciate his daily double wagering. He actually uses them as the advantage they should be.

One of the great subplots of any NFY is the crazy people who respond to his Craigslist ads. The new Michael Richards definitely has quite a background that they just hinted at.

But enough about Jared...

14 year old me is sad that it’s shutting down, but also secretly relieved that he doesn’t have to come up with reasons why none of his classmates want to chat with him.

I think you mean avoiding strawberries and drinking water only works so much.

Have Barron talk to everyone about the cyber.

Everyone knows cartoon characters can’t run for office, but this article presupposes maybe they can?

How awful do you have to be to screw up giving out aid to people? Trump acts like a massive hurricane destroying an island is no biggie, then apparently tries to show Steph Curry that not only is he not welcome at the White House, but also that he (Trump) has a better jumper, too. What a fucking disgrace to humanity.

I’m glad he’s here to say that the victims’ right to attend a concert without being murdered is worth less than gun manufacturers’ profits or gun fetishists’ delusions.

Fuck this guy

FUCK