"Do you want me to roll the 20-sided die?"

Don't think of the Event! And remain indoors.

I feel like it's unfair to use The Flintstones to sell your product. Basically any modern convenience is going to come off as superior to using some form of dinosaur to perform daily tasks, unless your daily tasks include trampling your neighbors' house flat.

And bears also.

But by far his biggest hit was "Arthur's Theme (Best That You Can Do)."

(Whistler flings paint-pot, walks out.)

Ruskin did some moderately good paintings. But he was no Whistler.

Oh man, you had to bring up having a soul. That totally killed my "Get out of Belsen free" riff.

Yeah, but if he did turn out to be alive, he'd sue.

You could spice it back up by making it National Socialist Monopoly.

I wonder if Germany has considered "Holidays in the Sun"?

He actually stepped off to the side to scream "I WON"T BE HUMILIATED LIKE THAT AGAIN!!" at the production staff, before wrestling a smile back onto his face.

I remember that stuff! It sucked.

The only person I can envision playing Oates is Illeana Douglas.

By attempting this he's certainly setting himself up to be the Fail King.

In terms of the logistics it might actually be easier— for one thing, the necessary limitations of a live performance would make it far cheaper than the average television drama, unless you went out and spent millions for big-name stars. But good stage actors are plentiful and cheap, and most would work for scale…

There's such a gaggle of narratives in At Swim-Two-Birds that I'd forgotten the framing narrative is first person. Good call!

I would argue for Charles Kinbote of Pale Fire, the unnamed narrator of The Third Policeman, and Tristram Shandy to be on any proper list.

Reilly's not the narrator though, is he? It's been a while but I recall the book being third-person.

"Tell Ted Turner to keep his goddamn crayon box away from my movie."