For reals? What do you do/where do you live....lets get this deadspin community moving to get you a new job.

6. Should read “bankruptcy"

Agreed.

Gardenhoser!

that was way too many words to say “if you don’t agree with my narrow world view, you suck.”

You want to see mobility....try taking away janikowskis vodka at last call....

This is so bad that I absolutely love it.

How many coaches have a 271lb kicker?

I know what happened in Notre dame, and I don’t think your idea is necessarily a bad one.

They should be harnessed in to ensure that the fence impaled them?

Dude, trigger warning. I'm still not over Kevin Maas or Shane Spencer.

I’m willing to bet he’s lucky to be pre-GED.

I think of all the copies infinite jest sold, there have been 7 confirmed cases of people actually finishing that book. I get it man, tennis and shit.

Starred solely for the avatar!

I like your views on things. Is it possible to write you in for president? I can wait 4 years if I have to.

There was a time when I enjoyed your posts. That time has ended. I will, however remember your musings fondly though, but alas, you are dead to me, and my heart is deeply broken.

...and the difference between the reasoning behind the now lifted ban in F1 and the reasoning behind the argument for the ban of these meters in bicycle racing differs because???

Secure your loads people.

I guess I kind of get your point...

Fellow attorney, just wanted to say I found this article to be absolutely amazing. I think you walked a fine line between this being full of “legalese” and it not being approachable for most people, and it being too elementary of an investigation into what is going on with the court cases here, especially describing…