This better not be your way of saying he gets beheaded.

If men are supposed to be the calm, logical, and rational gender, then why are they losing their minds over fictional characters in movie franchises? Did they get their periods or something?

I heard he waited till all the MAGAt types who produce him and who would’ve ordinarily taken steps to stop him had left the room. Real stealth like.

Mind yøu, møøse bites kan be pretti nåsti.

i really appreciated that the final compromise allowed the boys to meet up in the game to indulge their fantasies but that it ALSO allowed Theo to take off her ring, go out on the town, and flirt (and possibly/probably hook up?) with a stranger. it was clear that all 3 of them were sacrificing something in their…

What happened? This man’s prediction came true:

If they only ran one loop, they would have gotten their 6.4-mile split across then ran on to the finish line without doing the second loop.

I think he’s trying to calm things down before the white people go all Second Amendment.

God damn it.

Massive missed opportunity for “delayed gratin-fication”

“I’m not a racist Trump supporter, I’m a sexist and racist Bernie Bro.!  Get your facts straight!”

If you think I’m some alt-right Trump Republican, I’m not. I’m a liberal Democrat who voted for Bernie. Even though I’ve never voted for a Republican in my life, I absolutely will not put up with your [...]

That’s how long it took to find a pack of Kent IIIs, he said

You remember that Sunday morning, two months after dad left, you wake up and notice mom’s hair is seriously mussed, and then you walk into the kitchen and dad is making eggs like the past eight weeks never happened . . .

DREW I HELD MY POOP IN FOR WEEKS WAITING FOR YOU TO COME BACK SO I CAN HAVE A GREAT MOMENT IN POOP HISTORY

I’m a girl, so all my life I have been told that my clothing sends messages to other people. If I wear a skirt that is a little too short or a shirt that shows a little too much cleavage, I am apparently communicating that I consent to being groped or worse.

On a very minor side note, they’ve ruined red baseball caps. I looked good in my red baseball cap; now it just sits there, wondering what it’s done wrong and why we never hang out anymore.

Yup. As soon as these shits started getting painted as victimized angels, I started shouting that they were assholes in MAGA hats bused in from a boys school to protest women’s reproductive rights. Even if the black men and the native protesters started shouting at them, they deserved it.

I’m pretty sure weed is legal wherever Bill Walton is at any given time.

legal weed in Washington, you know Walton loves those trips!