I laughed because it's funny. Then I cried because it's true.

They exist to troll. Does this really surprise anyone?

I think tumblr is already doing a fine job by itself getting feminists to tear each other to shreds.

Is there some sort of saying that would apply here? Maybe some suggestion that the residents of a city conduct themselves in a certain dignified manner? I'm drawing a blank.

"I'm getting the hang of this er-"
My first, first, split-second reaction was "driving malarky", a second before the same words came from the son.

Ah to be British.

Of course he's a true Patriots fan. He barks at black people.

No snark on this one. That was awesome.

Obvious troll is obvious, do not feed!

He missed the point on purpose. This is what passes for clever and provocative in Troll Land. :\

I really hope that this wasn't posted by my 24-year-old, 5-foot-9, recently dumped-by-boyfriend, Coachella-loving daughter.

With that said, I cannot even imagine what freakish Frankenstein would fit these personality proportions. I picture a man in a business suit with the sleeves ripped off to reveal a tribal tattoo, clutching a Glo Stick to his heaving breast. He is wearing a baseball hat with a sports logo on it over a lamé headband. He…

PA ANNOUNCER: Holy heck, BASKET IS GOOD BY SPENCER McKINLEY! That's the ballgame, everybody! GET EXCITED!
PARENTS: [Jump up; cheer wildly]
GIRLS: [Jump up; cheer wildly]
BOYS: [Remain seated; hope nobody is looking]

He's gonna be Big Man on Campus now - which makes him a foot shorter than the girls.

It's that exact mentality that causes many of these deaths. It really can happen to anyone. You should really read this:

Humor. This piece is humor. I doubt we are supposed to actually follow these tips. This is humor. Humor.

Jesus, who let the Grinch have a login?

You...sound like a really antisex person without a sense if humor. I'm sure you'll do very well in Jezebel comments.