Oh god, I cannot disagree with you. I did not come off well there at all. All I can say is you’re right, I am sorry I told that story that way, and please know that the advice was a huge, terrible joke. We had discussed what we wanted to do regarding marriage and weddings and everything that at that point that there…

Right?!?! It doesn’t help that I have a baby face so when I say “husband,” they go, “you’re married?!?!” and I have to talk to them anyway.

Haha. Touché.

My partner and I—yes, I usually call him my “partner,” even though we’re a hetero couple, because I’m a pretentious grad student and have the vocabulary to prove it, and because “boyfriend” seems too casual and “fiance” implies some sort of traditional proposal/engagement and, as someone who kind of speaks French, I…