Hideously off topic, but Topamax right? Did you have this weird adjustment period where your tact and executive function were a little tweaky? Like, you were all, “WORDS. WORDS. TALKING TALKING. WHAT AM I EVEN SAYING. OH GOD. ALL THIS IS OUT LOUD”. I love the Topes, but dang, getting the dose dialed in was rough.

This is an excellent list! My kid and I make a list of FUNTIMEADVENTURES every summer and I am stealing some of these.

Sigh. I feel you. Crusty-foot solidarity.

FLOATING KITTEN!

This is such a great story! Thank you so much for sharing, it’s made my day!

Cuddle penguins?!?! *dies*

Well poops. Shia and I had the same day. I think that mean’s we’re... dating? Ugh. Am I going to have to start shaving my legs regularly? He’s going to need to lose the rat-tail if we’re going to do this thing.

Chicken snuggles and blankies? That sounds the actual best. I... I have terrible chicken envy.

OHMIGOD. Chickens give hugs? That’s a thing!? SQUEEEEEE

YES. That might be my new policy on the Beouf from now on! Ignoring him completely. Because COMPASSIONATE.

Omigosh! Are you me? Because I once made a watermelon punch for a wedding that made one of the brides barf on her shoes! (I shouldn't feel proud of that. But I kind of do.)

Is this the finest food you've got stuffed with the second finest?

These are exactly my feels. EXACTLY. Mr. The Rock, whence comes your arcane ability to transmute douchetasm to fuckability? WHENCE, dude?

Oh. Well, I guess that makes more sense. But it's way less hardcore and... adventury.

Sigh. My eyelashes laugh at puny eyelash curlers and point-blank refuse to hold a curl. They're jerks like that.

ACK! I want's them. Also, Kelly, have you given any thought to taking a look at wartime "ladies" magazines? I ask 'cause when I was a kid we had a copy of this book: it's a collection of the best bits of Good Housekeeping Magazine from the war years. It is the actual best; the clothes! the ads! the disgusting food!…

Wait. Can one actually do the scissors thing with eyelashes? I suspect you are joking but... I am CURSED with super straight eyelashes (the struggle is real) and I... I might be prepared to risk it. I mean, I have TWO eyes. And depth perception is totally over-rated anyhow.

Is it awful that I would only watch that documentary is Adrian & Leo died in the attempt to defeat it? I bet it would be hella moving! Right before their inevitably smooshing by the evil whale's laser guided smash-tail they'd be all, "Dude, I love you so much. Dude. I've always loved you so much. DUDE. It was never…

Sigh. That would be the greatest.

OUU! Co-signed. It could have a bear- type name (because hibernation is the best idea ever)! A Kodiak cooler? An Ursine Alexander?