I don’t quite understand why the answer to these questions and insecurities is “get some therapy to figure out your shit.” I mean, I’m not saying people who feel like this are crazy, but maybe they need someone to help them figure out their stuff, who isn’t an advice columnist or psychic.

Is she wearing a Vanilla Sky mask?

First things first: triceratops give lousy bjs. The combination of beak and three horns poking you in the stomach is a real mood-killer.

When I am at home alone and making pizza what I like to do is break it into frozen chunks, put it into a bowl and then microwave it until it is edible.

Seriously? Seriously?

Are they running a thigh-gap mod?

The cover mechanic worked so elegantly that it seemed like the only possible solution. I never played the first two Deus Ex games, but the 2011 version is still one of the best games I’ve ever played.

There’s already fourteen of them.

Kyle is an awful, disgusting, hateful narcissist. She may be in the right, but man, do I not give a flying fuck.

This is worse than when all the apocrypha got cut from the bible.

Beat me to it.

Police caught one 16-year-old teen claiming to be a “lookout” and grilled him

But didn’t he murder one of his clients?

*Naughty bits autoclave program enabled*

Fuck me, you dirty, dirty disgusting human.

See, I think the Turing test should involve more boning.

Isn’ that binary for “Help”?

I like how your stoned mind works.

Lucky you.

You mean the one we were forced to listen to on all our devices?