2-phase power?  What is it, the late 1800s?

“hybrid ... whose total system aims like a shark at an EPA-estimated 28mpg”

I’ve had both energy drinks and performed analingus, and even with the better brands of energy drinks, I’d much rather have the ass, TYVM.

There are some really cool datsuns from 73-94.

So stupid. “Derogatory” means that you are belittling or somehow negative towards something or someone. Eating ass can NOT be derogatory because it is tickling someone’s leather cheerio with your mouth parts, that may be pleasurable or weird, depending on who you ask but that’s a completely different category from…

I don’t want this, but, like touch screens instead of knobs and buttons, something tells me that its probably cheaper to manufacture, so we’re going to all get it sooner or later regardless. Have to offset the cost of mandatory autonomous breaking and lane keeping assist, or whatever other system is going to have to…

I never found keys to be burdensome 

I think some of it, too, is that the cowls are so damn high now that the steering wheel has to be high so it doesn’t look strange. Going from an old car with proper visibility to a new one almost feels like taxiing a taildragger.

Pour me a shot of redeye.

That’s looks stupid. I can easily change radio stations, adjust volume and temperature without taking my eyes off the road by knowing there those controls are.

Gotta watch out for those engine pretzels.

Seems like this is an update to the old way VW used to say “fuck you”:

Third Gear: Fuck Dyson. there is no such thing as a V6 digital electric motor, and if there were it wouldn’t be in your vacuum cleaner. Dumbass. Quit with the marketing gimmicks and give us real, competitively priced, better performing products.
I suppose that in the post-age-of-reason world, the religion of marketing…

Brought to you by Carl’s Jr.

You know, the more and more I hear about the Autonomous Future!™, the less and less crazy I think “preppers” are. Most of us have already sold our souls to Google, I don’t need my car spying on me too. David may have the right idea about hording old, analog cars, besides ya know, the not running part.

When she looked down and saw that her baby had no wheels her heart dropped. She knew the thing that she had feared all along had come to pass. Before she could get a word out, her husband angrily screeched his tires as he stormed out of the room screaming, “A boat! Unbelievable! How could she do this to me!”.

WHAT NEXT... APPLAUD GAYS IN THE BEDROOM?

Queer as a two dollar bill but even if I wasn’t, she’s got the sex appeal of a pipe cleaner.

Dude, if I launched that submarine into space... it would totally fly like this. *Jetson’s car noises while moving the joint through the air*

“LA traffic sucks man, what if we like dug tunnels in 3d like ants?”